I think the idea of not using a rigid meal plan is going to be your best bet. Rigid meal plans (I have found...) only set up for failure, either falling into restriction, or binging because your body is craving the food. And if you set things that you cannot rigidly eat, you're likely to want them, yknow?
Anyway, I believe there is hope. You're an intelligent girl and overall thought things are tough you've come through every tough time before, and you can keep on going.
Is it possible for you to get professional help? I know you say the services gave up on you but is there another way you can get some support?
Keep fighting & posting, you can do this
xxxx
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