you can live sober. i know for a fact that you can. my best friend is also extremely bipolar. she cycles about every hour. her d.o.c. is also heroin, but of course anything would do. she now has over a year clean and sober. 90 days off drugs is wonderful. a little slip with cocaine is not that big a deal. it is much better to slip with that than heroin or meth.
i understand how drinking can help keep you off of the other drugs, but i would suggest that maybe you should stop everything. once you detox everything out of your system it is better.
you are not an idiot. you are not a lying sack of s**t. you are just a person with substance problems. i would suggest being honest with everyone. tell your counselor. if you goto any recovery groups, tell them too. if people know what is going on then they can help you more.
*big giant hugs*
take care and pm me any time you want
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