First of all I want to thank you all for your replies and kind words. It means a lot to me that you felt able to offer support and kindness.
My shoulder hurts badly this morning. I haven't really been overdoing it or so I thought so I think I must have slept on my sore side. But I'm being able to do far more for myself than I have been able to do.
My mood is dropping at the moment. Probably just because I'm on my own and having nothing planned to do. That always puts me on edge. I just can't seem to settle down and my thoughts get to thinking it would be better if I wasn't alive any longer.
At the moment I can still tell that those thoughts are non-helpful but I have to fight them off and I'm tiring of the fight. It would be so much easier to just give into them. I really dont know how much longer I can keep fighting for. Meh.
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