Being 'grown' doesn't mean you should no longer wish for compassion, for support. You need that no matter what age, or stage, you are at.
Do you have anyone you feel close to?
Is a therapist/psych/etc a possibility for you, as you say things are creeping up again...would it help to have someone to talk face to face with?
Keep talking here, if it helps. I know it isn't quite the same. At least ppl here will understand and give whatever support they can.
As said, remember to be very proud of how far you have come, it sounds like you have worked very hard. Don't lose sight of that.
Feel free to PM if you would like/need ok?
Thinking of you
xxx
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