first off...i want to say im really sorry that you had to go through all that. my father is also an alcoholic. but i am too. im currently in recovery and staying sober. i drank basically for the same reason that i cut, to block things out, to numb myself to mental anguish, to forget, etc.
please dont be offended but im going to play devil's advocate for a second. i understand that your dad has put you through alot and the decision is completely yours. i just wanted to point out that SI"ing not only hurts us, but the people around us also. just because we arent staggering or slurring or passed out doesnt mean that we arent having an effect on those that love us. when they see the scars, it hurts them. the same way that it hurts you when you see your father in his condition.
so maybe if you could understand him a bit better, you might not be as angry and hurt.
im really sorry for your pain.
much love.
xx
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