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hello
My tutor has been a great help with me with my schoolwork but I feel that I don’t know, he has also been I don’t know, a somewhat of a good support. He has been the first person, well adult, that I can have a Christian conversation with, but yeah, he has made me see a lot of different things. What was even weider, was a had a Christian conversation with my counselor last week, it was such a shock. For me and him, I suppose. He said to me that one thing that God is about is love and that he does not judge us. We judge ourselves. I know, touchy, but it’s the truth, I have been guilty with it a lot. I said to my tutor last night, “I know that I did really well in my speech for English, but I feel/know that my essay that goes with my speech, is going to be awful because I rushed it and did it at the last minute (night before it was due) and my tutor replied “isn’t it funny how we put expectations on ourselves when it isn’t necessary?”. I couldn’t answer him because it shocked me that what my tutor was saying, was the truth. I believe in God and all of that, but why cant I stop self harming? Because I know that in someway or another, that it does hurt Jesus deeply. So why cant I stop? I am so confused. I prayed for half an hour last night and read alot of the Bible this morning, but i dont know, does that help things with me or not? Im confused but even more so, because my counsellor told me that being a christian is about having a relationship with Jesus, but i am not sure if he is listening to me half the time.
Just a thought, would i be allowed to post something that i have found that has helped me? Its just a general thing. Ill post it now but if its not alloowed on here, feel free to take it down.
Hannah
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