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Old 08-08-2009, 04:42 PM   #14
Coaster
 
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Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: California
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Beautiful-Disaster View Post
I dunno what I mean reallly.. I want to stop but at the same time I don't cause I know I'll end up cuttin again. Last night I had really bad urges.. ended up talking to my brother about guys awkward much?
I feel the same way! No one seems to believe me... they just think I'm not trying or copping out or something. But I'm *positive* that it's not over yet...

My counselor keeps telling me, "yes it can be over. You can do this... bla bla bla" but I just feel like I still need it.

I've gone about a month without doing it... but only because I was on a trip for three weeks and I promised myself I wouldn't do it over the trip. Now that I'm home I feel depressed again... and I haven't SH...yet... but I need to make it another month because my mom is bribing me with piercings. I just don't know if I can make it. I got SO close the other day to doing it.

But I didn't, and for some reason I don't feel proud of myself at all. My parents are all, "we're so proud of you!" but hearing that just makes me feel worse.

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