[De Stijl]

So I've decided to create a thread where you can talk about your experience with relationship abuse, whether it being sexual, emotional, or physical. Also to seek advice from other RYL members.

I firmly believe that after two abusive relationships that it was time to stand up for myself and do something about my last abusive relationship with a guy called Daniel.

Now, I was 18 at the time and I had moved to a town about three and a half hours from my hometown, where I had finished my HSC (higher school certificate) in year 12 and I had been offered a place at university. I had met Daniel at a bus stop on the last day of "O-Week" (Orientation Week) and decided that we should go to the party that night. So we did and we got trashed and that night we had our first kiss. And because my parents were staying with me for my first semester to see me settle in I couldn't tell them, but I eventually told my mother but not my stepfather. So they left for the holidays and I went back home for the holidays. I came back for uni and found myself a nice shared accomodation with an old couple which was just up the road from Daniel's place.
The relationship from there, started off rocky. He would suddenly break up with me, make me feel dreadful for stuff I wasn't responsible for, and then get back together with me and make me feel better. This went on for about 9 months. By the end of this 9 months, I had come down with severe depression, depressed by failing grades at university and depressed by the constant relationship issues with Daniel, so I quit uni. But Daniel was the only person that knew. One night we had an argument over something and I felt like I was pushed to the point of pulling a screwdriver out on him. Then things got physical after I put the screwdriver down.
An AVO was taken out on me, the cops were called to take his stuff from my place (as he had been storing his computer at my place while he moved) and I had to attend court. By this stage, I was mentally screwed up, I had cut my wrists to the point where I thought it was fun to draw patterns in blood across my wrists with the knife. He said to me that he would get back together with me if I got help, so I did, and he dropped the AVO.
Then I got kicked out of my place and had no choice but to live with Daniel in his new place that he shared with another chick and her bf. Things went good until the time where the cops where called again, and I got done with intimidation and instigating domestic violence, despite the fact that I didn't have a weapon in my hands and the cops were only called because we had an argument. Daniel was the one that did the damage. Before the cops where called, we were outside arguing and the next minute I knew, he had both hands around my throat and dragged me to the ground and the last thing he said to me was "I oughta f*cking kill you". And the cops wondered why there was bruising around my throat?!
So I got sent to a women's refuge for three days, was on the verge of suicide. I was on the phone to my mum telling her that I was going to kill myself that night. Despite all the things that happened to me over those 9 months, what I said to my mum that night, still makes me cry. Her and Dad came down and got me. I attended my last court hearing and pleaded guilty to something I didn't do. I only pleaded guilty because I wanted to get out of the town. I had a defence lawyer and everything. I was put on a good behaviour bond for six months and an AVO against me (Apprehended Violence Order btw) for a year not to come near Daniel ever again. Three days after I came home, I got a text message from Daniel saying:
"I'm sorry about everything, please come back. I still love you. I overreacted that's all."
That's when I hit the roof and my sister called him up saying to stay away from me, because in the end, if the cops found out we had contact, I would be the person behind bars.

But since then I met the father of my unborn child and I have been happy ever since and now I'm 20.