I know what you mean, I get that, they tell me to hurt people all the exact details of what I must do, everything explained precisely so there can be no mistakes. It terrifies me that I might actually listen one day. What my boyfriend always says to me is to ignore EVERYTHING they say, even if it seems harmless like your example of going to a coffee shop, because once they start getting you to do simple things they might move onto more dangerous things, so if you don't listen at all you don't even start to go down that road.
Sorry...it's late, I hope that made sense/helped maybe even.
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