I've read your post and I think you realise that you might need help with how your feels. Could you maybe speak to you GP confidentially, they can at times have influence over how fast CAMHS see you. Don't waste your energy on even entertaining what your teachers say to you regards mentsl hospitals and put down, they sound ignorant to mental health I wish I hadn't taken any notice of what my teachers said. Finally, you haven't failed in life, you just weren't up to sitting exams, just like someone who is ill wouldn't be.
Take care and keep trying to get the help you deserve
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