nonononoNONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONO NONO!
ive been trying
so hard
but nothing i say makes any sense
i tried to tell my friends
they just ignore it like it makes them uncomfortable
i think if i try again then they will stop hanging out with me
none of them will help me
they just think im pathetic and emo.
one of my best friends, alice, everyone always quotes her. because once the bad thing happened to her, and she worried that she was pregnant, found out that she wasnt, and got on with her life. she is perfectly open about it and sees nothing to worry about in it. she doesnt worry about anything though - she doesnt really have normal emotions
but everyone is always saying LOOK YOU DONT SEE ALICE MAKING A FUSS DO YOU and it hurts so much :'( it means i cant explain anything. it means im just trapped and alone
i miss my baby
she was gonna make everything better
i woudve given her EVERYTHING
i wouldve got a horrible job where i had panic attacks every hour, i wouldve braved my father. i wouldve moved far away from bromley with her and never seen the bad person again. me and patrick had stopped rowing. we were going to make a real go of it.
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