Originally Posted by
control freak
I haven't. I'm quite ambivalent at times and so far have never got to a point where I 100% wanted to recover.
Although I guess I was at 90% after I was sectioned. It was a huge wake up call and I just wanted to get the hell out of hospital and I knew I had to get better. I did but then relapsed a few months after.
Me too.
80-90% of me wants to get well. It was near 100% after I was in hospital for two weeks and I got a lot better after that, but I have had relapses in my depression since then.
I think the thing is, being 'depressed' or 'bipolar' or 'mentally ill' becomes part of how you see yourself. You can get to the point where you've been ill for so long that your concept of yourself consists largely of 'I am mentally ill". And so 'getting better' also means changing
who you are. Which is really ****ing scary because you have no idea how to 'be' anyone else or any other way... does that make sense?