Hm as for the suicidal thoughts (I only just read that), it's probably good for you to talk to someone professional. Do you have a psychiatrist or some kind of therapist who you can speak to? Or maybe even your GP? Sometimes just sharing it with someone can really help. You said you don't have anyone close that you can talk to about it, but a professional is there to listen to this kind of thing, and knows how to deal with it. Plus you have the safety of knowing that it's confidential.
I believe that exam stress is one of the hardest things to deal with - just fight through this and after your exams you will be able to focus on yourself more by doing some lovely things. Summer is just around the corner too! I keep myself going with thoughts of the wonderful things I want to do over the holidays and try to remember that even if my exams don't go as well as I'd like them to there are always retakes or another option. All you can do is your best, noone will expect anything more from you. Just try and relax as much as you can, and consciously take some of that pressure off yourself!
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