That doesn't make you screwed up in the head. It's totally understandable to feel like that, they're huge decisions to make! Things like that still terrify me. And anxiety and depression can make it even harder to think about.
Do you think maybe you could try and speak to your doctor, like you said? It might be that they could refer you to a counsellor or someone who could help you learn to deal with the anxiety and the scared feelings you're getting.
Good luck/take care. :)
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