Dear Dave,
I really wish there was something more I could do to make you feel better. The eloquence of your words make me realise that mine are inadequate. But I'll try anyway.
I don't think you realise how much you do for people, myself included, which helps to keep us sane and understood too. But it's not just because of that that makes me care about you - you are a great guy and don't deserve any of what's happening to you.
I am really sorry about what has happened with the person on RYL. I don't know why it's happened, but I hate it that its hurt you so much. Don't forget though, there are more people here that care for you. So please don't withdraw.
You're art therapy sounds really good, and the therapist a good guy. I'm pleased you've found someone you can talk to, and that he sounds like he's going to help you. Your therapist can get you some more help if he thinks it's necessary, so I think it is something to stick with, that things are going up now for you. I also think you might be surprised about how much it can help! Take you're last session for example - you spoke to him about what has happened recently, you got it out in the open and he listened to you. It may have taken over the session but that's not a problem - it is now out in the open and not bottled up in side you where it could have festered.
I think getting the graphic dark artwork out into the open can be cathartic. It allows you to focus your thoughts and feelings on to the screen, which can help getting them out of your mind, and stop them taking over.
I've gone back through your artwork on here and have noted a couple of my favourites - page 9 number 179, 'My Guardian survival instinct will it win, can I survive?' is the main one. It shows that you are fighting and winning against your monsters, and that you have the strength to do it.
My other favourite is page 7 post number 125 'Leave me alone'. This one strikes a cord with me on a number of levels - a) it's excellent, forceful and atmospheric. b) it reminds me of one of my favourite books, but most importantly c) it's exactly visulising the trouble I have with someone at the moment. (no one on RYL, but someone else, and I wish she would leave me alone!)
I do think knowing what you are fighting is a great step forward - you know what their strengths and weaknesses are. In a lot of your artwork it looks like you're surrounded by these monsters, but there are gaps and light in them too. Its the light that's the main thing for me, it shows that you know there is a way to fight them, that you have the strength to fight them. At the moment the light is small, but I have no doubt that it will expand with the more therapy and help you receive.
You are awe inspiring Dave, you're going through a crap time and are doing something about it. You show you're strength and power every time you turn on your computer and produce your artwork, and even more so when you post it on here. You are an inspiration to us all, Love.
You are my favourite Dragon, Dave.
Take care
Love Loz xx
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