It is not unusual to get used to the feeling of being depressed, or otherwise 'not well' and so feeling 'better' can often feel just as alien and disconcerting. However, you will get used to that feeling also, and it is a much better one to be used to *hugs*
You do deserve to feel better *hugs* keep reminding yourself of that.
Perhaps you could talk it through with a counsellor who may be able to help.
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