Support for Damaged...
 

Damaged is going through a hard time at the moment and is having trouble asking for support and has asked me to ask on her behalf she please can we show her a bit of love.

_______________________

I know you won't believe me but you do deserve support and things are hard now but they will get better. You need to let people help you and be honest with people. You might not see it now but one day you will realise people do care about you and none of this is your fault.
Take care
x

Damaged is a very special person, with very special qualities, she just has to start believing that and have the faith n herself that others have in her!!

u r not alone damaged and the support is here for you!

how can i believe that im "good" at things when i have a dad that turns round and says that SA and rape victums shouldnt have got themselves into that situation.... which just reinforces the fact it was my fault and that i am to blame for what happened which means i dont deserve help. how can i possible deserve help???i dont get it. i mean i shouldnt have gone to *names* house, we'd only known each other just other a week but me being my stupid self went anyway.... and then i went into his bedroom i mean honestly how stupid is that.... i deserved it i got what i deserved.... i even had a chance to leave because he got called away by his sister but no i stayed.... it was my fault!!!!!!!!!
and then with my ex... i went to his house i went to his bedroom and i fell asleep ... i shouldnt have done that i shouldnt have..... if i hadnt have fallen asleep he wouldnt have raped me and then i fell asleep again the only difference is i woke up the second time. i felt it the first time but i just thought it was a dream so i didnt wake myself up. it was my fault.... MY FAULT
:crying::crying::crying::crying:

Whatever you did, you did NOT deserve to be abused.
You can't blame yourself for falling asleep hun, it's a perfectly natural thing to do, we're supposed to sleep when tired.
Abusers are the people at fault, your dad was so wring when he said that victims were partly to blame. Just, no. You've done nothing wrong.

It's Not your fault!
I know it's easy to blame yourself for what happened to you hun, I know how easy that can be, but it's not your fault, it's really not, just remember that. You didn't ask for what happened to you. Your dad is wrong, he's really wrong. You really didn't deserve what happened to you, no one does.

*squeezes tight*

xxxxx

I totally agree with the above two postings! xx

thank you guys for the support

but i just dont understand how its not my fault
:crying:
i told my ex if his voices ever told him to r*pe someone id rather he do it to me than ruin some random girls life
i asked him to r*pe me instead of a random girl
i asked him to
I ****ING ASKED HIM TO
:crying::crying::crying:
it was my fault
IT WAS MY FAULT
MY ****ING FAULT
my fault

You asked him in order to protect others.
But then, he shouldn't be acting on it anyway. If he has voices telling him to rape people he needs help hun, and it was so wrong of him to do it.
Yes, you asked him to, but it wasn't because you wanted to be raped it was because you wanted to protect other people. He should never have raped you.

i never thought his voices would manage to take control
i never thought he would do it
i never thought he would acturly do it
but he did
and i cant handle it
i cant cope with it
its too hard
too painful
even though i deserve the pain
its just too much
too much

You don't deserve pain. You don't deserve any of this.
You didn't know that this would happen. It's not your fault. You weren't to know what was going to happen.
*safe hugs*

he shouldnt have to rape ANYBODY
he clearly has problems but how that could ever be an excuse to rape somebody in their sleep?? if he ever thought there was a chance he would do something like that then he should have had himself committed - I would if I thought I could ever do something so terrible!

You are such an amazing and good person honey, and you dont deserve ANY of this crap.
We are all here for you, no matter what
*hugs gently and safely*
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
bobbi

im not amazing though thats the thing
i dont know why people think i am
im not
im a horrible evil person
i mean i go to places i know where r*pes have happened because i feel like i deserve to be r*ped again
i horrible
i hate this
i deserve the pain but i cant cope with it
and the worst thing is
the first time he r*ped me he thought i was asleep the whole time
but i wasnt i woke up
i was just too scared to get him off me
so i pretened to be asleep
i thought that if i could fall back asleep it would make it a bad dream
and it wouldnt have happened
but it did happen
:crying:
i dont deserve all your kindness

if he heard voices like that it was his fault that he chose not to get help. you don't deserve any of this.

Does your dad know of your SA? maybe he doesn't realize how much his comments hurt you. *hugs* remember, you ARE worth so much more than those horrible people who did those things to you.

yeh he knows about the two SA's and the r*pes by my ex :crying:

then how can he say things like that? :-( that's horrible! no offence to your dad but it is - it's making you worse.
don't you see that when you're all scared and muddled up and upset that you cant see yourself clearly? you have a reason to lie to yourself - because you hate yourself. i have no reason to lie to you - i've never even met you!! i'm basing it on everything you've ever said and everything i know about you and I know the parts that you're ashamed of, and I think you're amazing :) that came out a bit wrong and backwards but I hope you know what I mean :P
in short - hurray for Damaged. Although that's a very negative name and it's hard to cheer it ^.^
xxxxxxxxx

i hate this
i want it all to end
how can i recover when my psych team isnt helping because they're changing me over to adults
i hate it
i dont wanna leave my psych shes lovely
i want it to die
i hate this
i need pain
more pain than im in now
:crying:

Sorry your having a hard time right now, just wanted to let you know that i'm here if you need someone to talk to and that my PM box is always open :) Keep fighting hun :)

Take care
Stace x

damaged you DO deserve kindness because you are a very kind person! your dad is very wroung you DID NOT deserve that at all!!!!!!!!!!!!

Honey none of it is your fault, whatsoever! Really, none of it.
I felt the same as you when it happened to me too, but eventually I was able to see that it wasn't my fault at all, but the person who did it. You'll see this one day sweetie, I promise you that! Its not you with the problem, its them, don't let that make you feel like a horrible person or anything!
You're beautiful and we all love you here. <3

they are helping you - once you move to adult maybe they will be able to help you more?
i know it may take time to trust a new pyche but she may be just as nice as the one youve got now