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-   -   Don't know what to do .. advice ? (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=95142)

HiddenStar 28-04-2009 06:20 PM

Don't know what to do .. advice ?
 
Umm .. okay i was perswaded by a friend to ask for some support ..

basically my parents don't approve of 90% of my friends and since sunday we have been argueing about who i hang around with .. i'm 15 .. and they say i'm not aloud to hang around with .. boys, people who drink/drugs, people over 17, anyone who drives, crimals, smokers, people who fight. i'm a teenager from a town where it's a big place for chavs.. all my friends fit into atleast 2 of those .. and they said in that case im not to have no friends ...

so this morning i was stood in frount of the frount door and my mum was shouting at me so i wouldn't move out to way so she wacked my head against the door ( i now have a big lumb on the back of my head) i kept my cool with her and just stood there .. so then she smacked me round the face a few times .. that was when i lost it and smacked her round the face once in self defence ( it wasn't hard atall it was just to snap her out of it) which never worked so she hit me a few more times. which was when i gave in and run off crying ..

i tryed being strong i just couldn't do it no more ... then she opened the door and went into the kitchen .. i have a puppy and she left the door open so i went to shut the door and she saw me push it and she put her fingers there so they got shut in the door .. and she told my dad and her work people that i attacked her :\

i don't know what todo .. im scared about my dad coming home .. I want to leave but have nowhere to go .. it's not the first time they have hit me either... any advice ?

Thanks
Stacey

OutOfTheWoods11 28-04-2009 06:51 PM

*Cuddles*

Sometimes we all do things that we regret hun :-(

Do you think your dad will listen to you?

That constitutes domestic violence darling.
You are ENTITLED to call the police or childline.

Seriously, don't let the situation get any worse :-(

Elphaba 28-04-2009 07:12 PM

*cuddles*

Can you tell a teacher/school nurse/someone you trust about what has happened?

As the above poster said, don't let the situation get any worse =(

HiddenStar 28-04-2009 07:21 PM

My dad will listen and believe my mum .. he always does .. Im too scared to tell anyone >.< x

Elphaba 28-04-2009 07:25 PM

Write it down in a letter and give it to someone? That way you don't have to talk about it or you could also email them or show them your posts on here.

I know its hard, but you need to get help

HiddenStar 28-04-2009 07:46 PM

But tell who ? I told social and the police about my brother sexualy abusing me and they did nothing atall .. even though i stil live with him they said im out of danger and they left it :\ what makes me think why bother with this x

Elphaba 28-04-2009 10:11 PM

Thats horrible! Tell a teacher maybe? I'm not really that sure to suggest for you to tell, your GP maybe then they could get you some help

HiddenStar 29-04-2009 02:32 PM

My mum is my teacher, im home schooled due to mental illness :\ i might try talking to my youth worker/leader on friday. Thanks x

sponge 29-04-2009 05:07 PM

you should definately talk to your youth worker/leader.

and personally she put her fingers in the door and maybe its just me but i believe in karma (but only sometimes) so she got what was comming.

maybe you could also talk to your youth worker about maybe getting yourself into supported housing and then they could help you go through school and stuff.... its just an idea.

i hope things get better for you i really do.

lolly_x 29-04-2009 06:58 PM

hun i'm not condoning what your mum did. at all as it was plain cruel i'm only giving you advice here if she attempts it again.

Quote:

so this morning i was stood in frount of the frount door and my mum was shouting at me so i wouldn't move out to way so she wacked my head against the door ( i now have a big lumb on the back of my head) i kept my cool with her and just stood there
That moment why didn't you just go to your room or something then the whole thig wouldn't have got so out of hand.

HiddenStar 29-04-2009 07:00 PM

She always puts me down saying i can't stand up for myself and im a cry baby .. so i stood up for myself :\ x

Wonderland. 30-04-2009 11:12 PM

Sweetie you should tell someone the youth worker would be a good idea or what about your GP. You shouldn't have had to go through that it is not fair at all. What I would say though is try not to retaliate and hit her back, (I know its hard not to as you don't really have time to think) as then she can try and hold that against you. Just try and get out of the situation as fast as you can without reacting. You know you weren't in the wrong and if you tell an adult such as your youth leader they can help support you through going back to social services, maybe you should also tell them about the sexual abuse aswell.
I hope you get help sweetie.

Amy x

HiddenStar 01-05-2009 11:09 AM

thanks ... will try talking to him tonight when i see him .. she hasn't spoken to me in 3 days .. well noone has :\ it's kinda really getting me down :( i mean she's hit me plenty of times before and it only lasts a day .. but since i turned 15 she's always told me i'll be in care or on the streets by the time im 16 :\ now she wont talk to me atall ive even tried talking to her :( kinda getting scared now .. thanks again x

Wonderland. 01-05-2009 05:23 PM

How she is treating you is completely wrong and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Try and see it as a good thing that she isn't talking to you then at least she can't say anything nasty to you. Sounds like it is quite lonely for you at the moment, try and get out of the house as much as you can so you don't have to be in the horrible atmoshpere all the time. Please do try and tell him, I don't know if I have suggested this before but maybe try and write it all down for him to read so you don't have to go through saying it all.
Let us know if tell him or not.
You can do this sweetie.

Amy x

HiddenStar 01-05-2009 09:57 PM

i spoke to him .. all he said was keep out of her way :\ x

erm 01-05-2009 10:31 PM

Is there an adult you trust who you can tell about this? Phone samaritans or childline and they can help you sort your options out xx

HiddenStar 01-05-2009 10:56 PM

i was thinking about childline :\ x

suspendeddisconnect 02-05-2009 11:06 PM

you NEED to tell someone. I used to be homeschooled and had friends that were homeschooled and when they were abused it made it even worse cause there was no escape. Call whatever protective services you can. You deserve so much more than this. *hugs* PM me if you ever need to talk.

HiddenStar 03-05-2009 03:41 PM

thanks :) i'm going to try calling childline tomorrow when the rest of the family are out :\ x

Popple 03-05-2009 08:06 PM

Good luck phoning childline I hope it helps.
x


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