Feeling guilty?
 

Does anyone else feel guilty for having mental health problems, like it's something to be ashamed about? Even worse, has anyone else ever been told that they should be ashamed of it?

I feel guilty all the time. I feel like someone like me should be around people; and outsider. But recently I learned that everyone has something wrong with them, which makes it normal. I don't know a single person that doesn't have some time of learning dissability or mental illness. So don't worry about it. Someone told you you should be ashamed?

Personally i often feel guilty/ashamed about it.Its just how i am but it doesnt mean that we should be!

i dont think ive ever been told as such that i should be ashamed of it but i do think that maybe ive been treated in a way at times by some people which indicates i should be and/or that they think less of me because of it.

im sorry if you feel guilty/ashamed.i know its hard but try not to, you have enough to deal with and it isnt your fault!

im sorry if someone has told you that you should be ashamed though, in my opinion they are wrong and you shouldnt be [though i know as i said even i still feel it at times!] and maybe they are not the person you thought they once were.

If they said that it is not a reflection on you, but more on them.

It sounds like your having a hard time and i hope that things pick up.Take care.

Yeah, my mam pretty much drilled into me that depression is a sign of weakness, EDs are just stupid diets, and yeah, she's called me names before like "****ing loony". So i grew up thinking mental illness was a a sin really.

I often wonder what on earth i have done to deserve to live and think like this. I am ashamed that i have to take pills just to be able to act like a normal human being.

Although i know that theres nothing to be ashamed of, as its an illness, theres such much stigma and prejudice, sometimes you cant help feeling ashamed. x

i feel guilty for it, and was told it was self-indulgent to let them get the better of me. in my case it's probably true but i wouldn't agree with that for you, or anyone else. with MH problems the general impression i get is people think of it as weakness or think you're dangerous. there's no in between, tolerant/understanding reaction. but that's only general impressions based on not very much.

That's actually a really good point.

Yeah, plenty of times:

- I've had the whole "you're only doing it for attention" thing loads of times, making me feel ashamed of it.

- Two of my family members shouted at me for it after I came out of hospital.

- Someone also told me that I didn't deserve to have any friends because of it too. She said (after my old friends diched me 'cos of my illness and when I was trying to make new ones) that I ought to get my head sorted before even thinking of having friends.

:angry:

I used to feel very guilty about it. Now I don't. Unfortunately there are a lot of people in the world who do think that mental illness is about weakness and that people should be 'ashamed'. But that's because they are ignorant, and they don't understand. The problem is that people think that because they can't see any physical evidence that you're ill, you must be lying or being dramatic.

But having a serious mental illness is like the neurological equivalent of having a broken leg. You've got a real injury, it's just that it's in your brain where people can't see it. If you broke your leg and you had a cast on it, would people expect you to go walking or jogging? Would people tell you that you're faking it to get attention? Would they tell you that you didn't deserve to have friends because you broke your leg? Unless they were very weird, sadistic, messed-up people, I think not.

If people didn't believe you, you could show them the X-ray of the break, right? Well if you could afford a really fancy type of brain scan, you could show them your mental illness too.

You know what? **** them. You have a medical condition which you have no control over, it's not your fault you have it any more than it's a cancer patient's fault that they have cancer. (ok in some circumstances it might be partly their fault, like say they smoked 40 a day for most of their life. Some people get depression or psychosis because they smoked a LOT of marijuana, but most people are just innocent victims.) Don't let people make you feel bad for it, just because they are stupid and ignorant and don't understand.

Actually I have been told that I was acting out for attention by my grandma. It never really bothered me, though it should have. When someone has a mental illness, they can't help it. It's your brain, not you. Just remember that.

Yeah I feel ashamed and guilty.

I feel ashamed especially at the moment as I am off work again. It's laziness isn't it.

No, it is NOT laziness. It's the fact that when you are suffering from moderate to severe depression, your brain goes into a sort of hibernation-like state. Your overall brain activity is significantly reduced. This causes you to suffer from a lack of motivation. It is not a personality defect like laziness, it's a neurological symptom of your illness. It does not make you lazy. Please don't feel bad about it. Your brain is running on half-empty. It is much harder for you to do things like go to work and get on with your life than it is for other people. Laziness is when people have a full tank of gas but they don't use it. It's NOT your fault.

I used to feel guilty about having mental health problems, but my attuide has changed now I've kinda got "This is way I am and there's nothing I can do about it" attuide. Take care, hun. xo.

I feel that way pretty often. But I try and remind myself that the only thing I can do is try and get better to the best of my ability, and I am doing that, and as long as I'm am doing that I have nothing to feel guilty about.

I've never been told I should be ashamed of it though. If you have you just need to know that whoever said is very misinformed about mental illness. You have nothing to be ashamed of.

Thanks for your comments, people!

Just one more question: has anyone else ever been told that they don't deserve friends because of their illness?

No-one has told me that, but once my friends found out i was a "loony" then I feel no-one has bothered with me. I pretty much have no friends now. There was one in particular who i thought would stick by me and help me out but i've seen/heard off her once in over 6 months.


Anyways. I hope no-one has told you that :shocked: ???

Yeah, I was told that I didn't deserve friends because of my illness by an adult when I was 14. To make it worse, I had only just come out of hospital and all my previous friends had deserted me because they didn't want to hang out with a "loony" so what the adult told me was totally inappropriate...

:crying:

I'm sorry to hear that. I was never told I didn't deserve friends but I have lost a lot of 'friends' as a result because they didn't want to deal with it. But to be honest I realise now that they weren't real friends anyway if they treated me like that. Mental illness can mean you lose out on casual acquaintances, but real friends won't desert you for it. I firmly believe most people can count their true friends on one hand.

I feel very guilty about being ill; especially as i have just been given early retirement. I fee like i didnt try hard enough. Lots of ppl on here are really ill but they still manage to work/school...
romp