what do i say?
 

hi
my friend is very down, self harms, is on meds for depression and anxiety, doesnt live close to me and is worrying me a great deal.
we communicate daily thru msn and have supported each other a lot through various ups and downs in both our lives

but this time feels different - i see them sinking further than i ever have before and i am afraid i am beginning to lose them
i can only reach so far and i know i can only do so much, but i feel so helpless watching this happen.
i know one day they may well decide to end their life and i equally know there isnt a damn thing i can do about that either.

i am near to tears as i type
beginning to think i am trying to hold onto snowflakes
i am trying hard to say the right things in support but more and more i am coming up against negative responses
they cant be bothered with the fight anymore and i dont know how to reignite that will to live

and now they fall

I know its hard but there is only so much you can do for a person.
And if they are not willing to accept help then there is nothing you can but let them know that when they are ready you are there.
And if you really think they are at risk of killing themselves inform someone who can get them somewhere safe.
You need to remember to take care of yourself first and foremost because it is not your responsibilty to care for others even if you want to help.
xx

I would tell your friend how you feel. Tell them that you care about them, that you've noticed they're really struggling and that you're worried, and encourage him or her to get help. Beyond that, there's not much you can do I'm afraid. Like Miss Pixie said, if somebody is not willing to seek professional help then all you can really do is offer a shoulder to cry on and a listening ear, and gently encourage them to get the help they need. Alternatively, you could let somebody know who is near to them and can help them in a more practical way. That sounds like a mean thing to do, but it's really not if it's going to keep them safe.
Take care of yourself too. I know you want to help your friend but you're not responsible for them.

*Hugs* Im very sorry that your friend is struggling. There is not much you can do to help if they are not prepared to seek help. You said that your friend is on meds. How long has your friend been on the meds for? If they have been on them for quite a long time then it may mean that the meds need ajusting, either upping or changing the meds altogether. You could encourage them to go to the doctor to talk about the meds they are on.

Other than that as i mentioned you cant do anything but let your friend know that your there for them. Have you told your friend how worried you are? If not you could just mention that your very worried, that you care about him/her a lot and that you dont want to lose him/her. Have you tried encouraging them to go to hospital? I know that your worried your friend will end there life but you are not responsible if that did happen.

Take care best wishes Ian

As already said, there's only so much you can do for your friend(s).
Just make sure that you're there for them and they can talk to you anytime about anything. That's really important. If you think they are suicidal or going to harm themselves it's important you tell someone who can deal with it and help them. Maybe tell a teacher, school counsellor, a doctor... anyone. Even if they do hurt themselves it's also important that you don't feel as if it's your fault - because their actions are not your fault. I don't know what else advice to give, but stay strong. Take care sweet. xx