Any GOOD experiences of family therapy?
 

Hi guys!
Today I'm going to a family counselling session with my mum. It's been a bit of a rush job since things have become really bad for me at university. (If you'd like more info click here.)

The thing is every other family therapy session with my mum has resulted in me feeling rather mauled by her. I feel that she thinks that a session is her chance to get her feelings out about me and let people know about the "true me". I reckon she sort of feels validated by the fact that another person is there and the fact that "anything goes" in counselling. I find that she's really articulate when it comes to speaking her mind whereas I get all choked up. I'm more articulate when I write things down but of course I don't get time for that during a session.

Due to the reasons in the post I linked to I can see why my mum would be angry with me however I want a chance to have my say too. I've sent her an e-mail explaining how I feel but I don't know if she has had a chance/chosen to read it. I was thinking of taking a printed wersion of the linked peost to counselling but seeing as this is probabaly a one-off appointment til I come back in September I'm not sure if this is a great idea. What do you guys think? Can any of you relate? Have any of you had good family therapy experiences and how did you get the most out of them?
Thanks in advance guys!
Kiran
xx

When I was inpatient at a self harm unit, I had family therapy twice and found it very useful. Both my parents attended along with myself and two therapists who mediated.

They learnt a lot about why I behaved like I did and I learnt more about how they were dealing with me and boundaries and stuff.

When i was ill i hated family therapy - i had it once a week for over a year. Especialy as an inpatient i felt that it was an hour of everyone slagging me off. However now im in a better frame of mind i realise those sessions did do good. As a family it gave us chance to explore our emotions and come to terms with my illness without a massive slanging match. We still have family therapy every so often and all of us enjoy going and find it a positive experience.
I think the way to get the most out of your sessions is to be honest, if you have issues etc, use the session as a safe place to talk to your mum, where someone can help her understand.
Good luck hunny
xxx

I hated family therapy when I first started but by the end I found it really useful, my mum and I are a lot closer and much better at sharing our feelings now. Could you perhaps write down your feelings instead and show them to the therapist? xx

Heyya,
I was suppose to be having family therapy once, but it never went ahead. =/ Though I don't think my family needs it. Anyway, how did it go? xx

I had my last family therapy session today. We've all found it very helpful in working through family issues that come with my illnesses. :)

Thankyou guys, your replies have been really helpful, Unfortunately it couldn't have gone much worse. I was indeed trying to be honest and in fact the night before I had wriiten an e-mail to my mother explaining how I felt. I don't think I've been honest for a number of years about my feelings so I found that when I was I burst into uncontrolable floods of tears. This is NOT like me at all-I never cry but I was crying as I wrote the e-mail, that is why I knew I had to write things down as I knew I would never be able to speak about them. It's the first time I've put myself out there and I don't think I'm going to be able to do it again. My counsellor had to tell me to calm down as there were bereaved people in the room next door which I can completely understand but to tell you the truth she just seemed keen to get rid of me. I have never felt so invalidated in my life.