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Threw it away. (SI/SH Trigger)
I feel bad...and I need someone to know what I did.
Monday night, I threw away at least 6 months of being SI-free. The cuts weren't bad...nothing deep. I feel guilty, I really do. And I feel even worse because mostly all I can think about now is cutting again...and how much I WANT TO. Ugh. I'm sorry, I just needed to get that off of my chest. I have no one to confide in anymore, it seems. :( |
You can confide in us :) You didn't throw it all way. You still went six months without it. You slipped up, you stumbled, you just have to be strong and believe in yourself. Pick yourself up and dust yourself off. There's always another day :)
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Heyy,
I'm sorry to hear that! *HUGS* Keep trying hun. I know it's hard once you've slipped up and then you think do you really want to try again, but you can do it again! :) xx |
Thanks. :)
I do feel a bit better now that I've gotten it off my chest. Makes the urge to do it again less demanding, I think. And I'm very glad I found this place. I don't think I've ever felt so welcome anywhere before. -hugs- |
There's a difference between a slip up and throwing it away. I don't think you've thrown anything away in the greater scheme of things, we all slip up from time to time it's just a part of recovery I think
Take care |
That's a really good way to think about it...I like that. I'll keep it in mind. Thanks!
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i totally agree with x nomirrors x, throwing something away is the same as giving up. slipping up means that you are still striving to be clean but made a mistake. the best thing about recovery is that you can have it anytime you want. so when you mess up you just start again. good luck and don't bash yourself over the head to much
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Slip ups happen sometimes. I slipped up once after eleven months.
Just take a deep breath and get back to getting yourself free. Good luck! :) |
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