Am.. :(
 

Hey all,

Sorry i aint been helping or around much lately, life's getting hectic again. Am not sure am coping to great, everything's getting on top of me again and am suffocating. Am meant to be starting a new job soon and am panicking am not sure i want to do it anymore, it means that when i have my weekends off from endless uni and the load of assignments its bringing at the mo, i will have to travel 3 hours just to go to work getting up at 4am and not getting back till 4am the next day because of how public transport runs. I dont have the energy i just want curl away and dissapear a black clouds hit me and i've been having bad thoughts again. I just feel so drained, and on top of that i think i might be pregnant and am terrified. I just feel am failing at everything am letting people down yet again. I have no right to be here i just leech off people and bring them down.
I dont know what am gonna do am not sure how to get through this, am panicking and paranoid all over again.

Phoenix x

Sorry if this sounds silly but is the job necessary as it seems you have plenty to have to cope with already? 3 hours is a long way to travel. Is there no way you could try and get a job closer to you?

*hugs* take deep breaths. I agree with "no reason" is there no job you can get closer to home, spending that amount of time driving on top of everything else will completely drain you. You have every right to post please say anything you want. You don't sound like you're failing at all, uni is a very impressive thing to deal with. If you really are finding it difficult do you have a nice tutor you can talk to? I know mine was very understanding. I hope things get better for you and please feel you can post here, we understand and want to support you. Take care, hugs, Hannah