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Sorry - I am in a really bad state of mind
These are some lyrics from Pink - Family portrait; this is what its like at home exactly: Momma please stop cryin, I can't stand the sound Your pain is painful and its tearin' me down I hear glasses breakin as I sit up in my bed I told dad you didn't mean those nasty things you said You fight about money, bout me and my Sister And this I come home to, this is my shelter It ain't easy growin up in World War III Never knowin what love could be, you'll see I don't want love to destroy me like it has done my family Daddy please stop yellin, I can't stand the sound I ran away today, ran from the noise, ran away Don't wanna go back to that place, but don't have no choice, no way Can we work it out? Can we be a family? I promise I'll be better, Mommy I'll do anything Can we work it out? Can we be a family? I promise I'll be better, Daddy please don't leave In our family portrait, we look pretty happy Let's play pretend, let's act like it comes naturally In our family portrait we look pretty happy We look pretty normal, let's go back to that In our family portrait we look pretty happy Let's play pretend, act like it goes naturally I dont have long on the laptop I am not even supposed to be on here If dad finds me.... Im in deep shit --- put it that way Last night was bloody awful, mum and dad were screaming and chucking stuff at eachother, my sister was in bed and i had given her my old mp3 with tunes and she fell asleep with it on full blast so she couldnt here anything that was going on. They were mainly arguing about me - recently i left sixth form (im going back in September) but i left coz the hospital and doctors made me because im not well. Mum and dad were yelling about how much of a failure I am and how much I have let them down... even yelling about kicking me out. They were both agreeing with eachother on that. I am not going to say the other stuff that was said --- but it really hurt and still hurts today. I will never forget it all. I have never forgotten what they said in a single argument yet. I came off my laptop last night - they were still screaming and I could hear mum in tears... dad just kept screaming at her. I couldnt deal with it. The voices were there; most things they were saying my parents were saying too. I SI --- quite a lot. But I am still really bad today I need to do something more than SI Im desperate V xxx |
*hugs* words hurt so badly sometimes.
Is there somewhere else you could go for awhile to try to get your mind off things, like a friends house maybe? |
Try and get yourself out of the house, go for a walk or to a friends. I know what they said hurts, especially when it is your parents. Is there anytime that they are not arguing? If there is, maybe that would be a good time to sit down and tell them how they make you feel and that you are trying. If you feel that you cant speak to them face to face, then you could write them a letter and tell them to read it when they have calmed down.
Try to stay strong. Is there anyone that you can talk to about whats going on, like another family member or a friend? If not, what about calling childline 0800 11 11 or the samaritans 08457 90 90 90. Take care. |
Im not allowed out the house
I am really stuggling --- i hate admitting it :S My SI is getting outta control It keeps getting worse yet i cant stop V xxx |
Thank you for your replies
Means a lot Xxxxx |
mummy :'(
*hugs x 10000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000* ilySFM XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX |
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