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-   -   SH info/support for adults (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=79566)

BoundNoMore 03-01-2009 09:49 PM

SH info/support for adults
 
Why is all the information out there about and geared towards teens who self-harm?
I mean I know they need support too, no matter how hard I look I can't ever find any info/support strictly geared towards adults.
I know I am not the only adult who struggles with it, but there is no info/support for us!!!
And that honestly makes me feel kinda "alone"... or like SI is just something that I should have "grown out of" once my teenage years passed.
Am I making sense? Does anyone know of any info (support sites etc) for adults?

jellytot 03-01-2009 10:10 PM

i know people that have made sites and stuff but idk they aint geared towards sh as a general whole they geared towards problems
i wanted to start a site but my internet is so slow that i cant :( ryl is amazing tho RYL <3

Kahlia1981 03-01-2009 10:43 PM

Amanda, I'd noticed this as well. I'm not sure why this "phenomenon" occurs, possibly just because the people making the sites for info and support have blind spots when it comes to older people using SI/SH as a coping mechanism ?? No idea though. I also start wondering whether I should have grown out of my reliance on SH as a coping mechanism. You are, by the way, making definite sense. I'll keep my eyes open, not having heard of any sites geared for adults, but let us know if you find anything.

ravynsoul 04-01-2009 02:46 AM

I agree, you're making sense, and it sucks that most of the resources out there are geared to teens... but you're not alone; look at all of us older ones here who haven't "outgrown" it. I think there was a thread a while back in either vets support or vets general about "ageism and self harm" or something like that where people were discussing this issue. Can't remember if any resources were mentioned in there.

Stellata 04-01-2009 12:08 PM

There are sites that speak of self harm in adults, generally in relation to child abuse survivors, and dissociative disorders - as fairy_princess says, connected with problems rather than self harm in general.

IcarusDrowning 05-01-2009 06:33 AM

Yeah I raised the question in Vets...I think as others have talked about Adult SH is a misunderstood condition and often put in the too hard basket..or believe that there must be another dominant condition that must be the thing that needs to be addressed?

It is highly annoying.

1ofmany 05-01-2009 12:59 PM

I think there is a circular problem here. Teens and younger people are more likly to be found out about SH (due to living with parents, school changing rooms etc) and so that is a focal point. Also some youngsters consider it a "fad" and do grow out of it (although in my oppinion those are the ones that need serioes help). Due to this people have focused on Teens, so when adults research it they think "Well i am not a Teen i should have grown out of it" and it becomes an embarisment and a thing to keep secret. By doing this studies on adult SH are not done and people think its confined to Teens and so on.

Dunno if that made any sense.

Bitter_Angel 05-01-2009 11:05 PM

I know what you mean.
Perhaps this is an issue for the CT team to bring up and work on for RYL

1ofmany 05-01-2009 11:09 PM

Its not a RYL problem really, in fact RYL is doing somthing, the vets corner is a place for adults!
By getting us talking like this it is having an affect (or is it effect? i always get those confused) on those adults who feel alone.
I dont know if i count as an adult i am 20 but still feel like a lost 12 year old.
But adult SH is an area that needs to be explored more and understood.

Heidi Tiger 05-01-2009 11:16 PM

I've found this too. It's not just online support sites, my local hospital has a self harm team, but they only see under 18's who present in A+E having self harmed, because obviously if your over 18 and cut you don't need help *rolls eyes*

1ofmany 05-01-2009 11:19 PM

WTF that is totaly idiotic and more insane then any of us! What do they do? say "yeh thats a deep wound you are loosing blood...but your over age next please"?

Why is this world so mad? I admit SH may be more common in younger people but older people need help too!

Sigma 11-01-2009 09:30 AM

http://www.sane.org.uk/Research/SelfHarmIntro

Someone posted this in 'News & Debate' - it's a good summary of SH and quite clear that people of all ages are affected so I've shown it to a couple of friends to help them understand...

BoundNoMore 15-01-2009 09:57 PM

Wow... that's cool :)
Thanks!!!

airwolf282 16-01-2009 08:34 AM

hugs Amanda,

I know it can be frustrating when society seem to think that self harm is all a teenage goth/emo problem or is the result of childhood abuse. I'm about to turn 27 and I have issues with SH and BPD. The general view of society is that these are things that teenage girls are supposed to have problems with, not men in their late 20s. Or maybe it's a way of trying to protect our youth. Some treating doctors may be of the opinion that resources are better off used for saving/protecting young lives than wasting on oldies like me that they think are a lost cause anyway. Others believe SI is a bid for attention but that theory can be thrown out the window because like many here, my SI is kept top secret and barely anyone outside of this site knows about it. It's already been said and I agree with the fact that teenagers can't hide it as easily due to living with parents, sharing rooms with siblings, changing clothes for sport etc although most people who are SI'ing are significantly depressed and probably don't engage in many outside activities anyway.


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