I just, can't do it.
 

If I take my morning meds I fall asleep within 15 minutes.

If I don't then my mood drops even more & i dont go into town and pay off my overdraft before the charge me £60 & i dont get the council tax sorted and i have to pay £200 that I don't have and don't get my benefits sorted and omg i can't cope with all this. I can't face going into town. I'm having an incredibly **** day. I got up and showered and everything and just can't face making that one last move.

back into the PJs. Calling up the mother crying down the phone.

Oh lord.

OMG I just sent my mum a txt saying I really wasn't having a good day and now I'm scared so going to hide in my room and cry a lot.

It said: I'm not having a good day. I think my abbey [bank account] may be about to go overdrawn but every time I go to get ready to go to town to check/sort it out I just burst into tears. Is there any way you could pay like £20 in today [I paid £5 on my card & took £10 out] & I'll sort it out tomorrow? I'm sorry.



I'm so so scared.

& thank you D. It means a lot.

GO HOME!

I get in a similar way a lot... just can't face doing things, will plan to get ready and everything but be totally unable to go through the door...

I really don't know what I can say to help... I'm not sure there is much you can do on one of those days, forcing yourself often achieves very little...

sorry, wish I could be of help

I have to work tomorrow 'til about 4. By 5 i'll be in the car on the way home.

Not long till you can go home now! Just try keep that in your mind all of tomorrow to help you get through the day.

Re. the meds, you've not been on them that long have you? My current one's used to completely wipe me out the first few weeks I took them, I could barely walk to uni I was that exhausted. But if you can stick with them your body seems to adjust and the tiredness may decrease.

Take care
xxx

God I miss feeling safe.

it is horrible feeling not feeling safe, you can do this, as heidi says it is not long
till you go home. offers hugs.

i want to scream and shout at the world.
i want to break down and have someone to hold me tight.
not just someone, but someone special.
& im a ****ing **** so i won't get that.

Babe *hugs* im sorry your feeling so crap. Di d you mum pay it for you? xxx

I didn't go to work.


I'm just gonna sit in my room and cry instead.

*cuddles*
Sometimes not going to work and sitting in your room and crying instead is the best thing you can do for yourself.
I am sorry you are feeling so lousy hun.
Take care

*cuddles*
Thinking of you chels love
Try take care of yourself and look after yourself a bit alright
If you need anything Im always here
Much love
xx

((chels))

When I first started my meds they knocked me out within fifteen minutes. Thankfully after a few weeks I got used to them and stopped feeling like a zombie.

*sends chels squishes*
argh. i wish i wasn't such an idiot, and that i could say something to make you feel better. but chels, sweetie, you are a lovely person, and i can't think of any one who deserves to be feeling low less. please look after yourself yeh? i know i'm not the only person on here who thinks you're lovely!
hang in there x

I am home.

I was stupid to think that just because I actually have something solid wrong with me & that my Dad's been acting differently & actually trying to help me out recently that it would last.

I hate mornings. I hate my meds. I hate everything except I don't have enough energy to hate it.

Wait, Chels. How long are you home for?

Because I'm home too, until Tues morning - want to meet up tomorrow? Just chill out for a bit?

My meds I've just started (seroquel for manic depression) knocked me out the first few weeks, it was a nightmare. It does get better though, it really does.

Your dad doesnt understand and that must be really ****ing tough, but you need to concentrate on keeping safe, even if that means that you spend the week in your PJs in bed.

I can relate to some of the things you've said & it's ****ing horrible so *sends squishes*.

Hope things get a bit better honey.
x