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-   -   im horrible (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=73486)

Sunshine 18-11-2008 09:06 PM

im horrible
 
ive given my dad bells pawsey, my mum depression, my brother stress and the whole family live on a knife edge constantly because of me!

i have done some horrible things to this family! my "illness" has made me soo out of it and not their, that i break windows to escape when locked up bite my mum and brother when restraining me! and tell them all that i hate them and dont love them! but i am not ill! i am jut a selfish idiot who only thinks about myself!

my 14 year old brother has had to restrain and has force fed me in the past by trying to shove food in my closed mouth! he is 14 he should not have to live with that! he deserves to be worried about school work not if his sister will be at home when he gets home from school everyday!

i am a horrile person!

l'il esky 18-11-2008 09:59 PM

you are not horrid baby cakes, you are lovely and supportive and care lots about people.
try not to beat yourself up about it too much, it is outta your control,its not like you do it on purpose. the bells palsy is a neurological condition so you wouldnt have caused that

are you recieving any professional help? xx

Sunshine 18-11-2008 10:06 PM

yer ive just got taken off my section and am currently ment to be in hospital but i have been refusing to go in because i hate the place so much!

and bells pausys can be brought on by stress! :-( but thanks for trying to cheer me up!

l'il esky 18-11-2008 11:55 PM

hun, try not to blame yourself....as i said you dont chose to have a mental illness.... big huggles... nite nite xx

Scabette 19-11-2008 03:00 AM

It's not your fault that you're ill. And you didn't cause your familys' illnesses either. You aren't a horrible person, you're struggling. Try and get as much support as you can. If hospital isn't helpful, is there anything else you can do? Take care,


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