Some advise? (may trigger)
 

Ok, this may take a while to explain, so if you dont want to read I dont mind. But i just want some advise and to I guess explain some things about myself? That sounds odd, but never mind.

I was on this site about a year and a half ago, suffering from pretty bad depression and self harm among other things. I was forced to seek help by friends, which I am greatful for. I had councilling through school and went to the doctors and I recieved 6 sessions of councilling through the NHS. My Dad was so angry with me when he found out what I had been doing for 5 years. Well after then I didnt seem too bad, only harming a little on the odd occation but Ive slowly been slipping backward.

Within the past couple of months Ive been really shakey and panicky. Ive been at Uni for a year, studying and working out on placement (part of the course). Ive been harming more and more, getting to the point now of almost everyday. I told a friend at uni who is really worried about me. She took me to A&E the other week because Ive been constantly punching the wall and thought I had fractured my hand. Im still doing it now. I didnt get any x-rays but I might have done something to it. Im anxious a lot, getting muscle twitches/spams. Ive had a couple of panic attacks and I feel really low. I week or two ago I was also increadibly stupid, I got very drunk, took drugs and almost passed right out. I really worried my friend, I know it was really serious. I was silly.
Well now I have exams coming up, dealines to meet, things to get done. Im just stressing out. Im worried Im going to fail everything again like I did before. I need help, can anyone give some advise. Sorry to go on?

Thank you.
x.

part one is admitting how bad things are getting, which you have done.

if councelling helped before then it should do again. most unis have a councelling service, or you could look for charity run places (eg. mind is national, but a lot of places have young persons' councelling and support).

medication is also an option; just talk to your GP.

i would also recomend talking to your personal tutor about how you are struggling. they are usually very understanding, and can be a practical help with things like extentions on coursework, and longer times and smaller rooms for exams.

that you have gotten through this before is a good sign that you can do it again.

I would suggest going to see your GP and telling him all of this. They could offer you counselling again which might be a good option for you. He may also be able to prescribe some medication to help you, like antidepressants.

As yanna said, it would be a good idea to talk to somebody at uni about how stressed you are so you can have longer deadlines and stuff. Is there a disability service you can go to? Sometimes they offer counselling and support within the university, too.

You should probably get your hand X Rayed too, to make sure you haven't done any damage.

And the usual- try to stay off of the alcohol/drugs as they will only make you feel worse.