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-   -   Do you want children? (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=67469)

sherlock holmes 06-10-2008 06:38 PM

Do you want children?
 
I've always wanted kids, I always imagined I'd find the perfect bloke and get married and start a family.

Recently I've been wondering if that's ever going to happen. Life doesn't usually turn out the way you expect. And I'm not sure if I want kids anymore. I don't know what sort of a role model I'd be, I'm not exactly doing a good job of looking after myself so I don't know what I'd do with children.

I would need to be totally recovered to have kids, otherwise how could I bring a human into a world I don't want to be in? Or maybe they'd provide me with something worth sticking around for. Something to think about I guess.

Do you want children?

griddlebone 06-10-2008 06:39 PM

Yep, I do....with the man Im with now. I dont want any at the moment though.

Rawrk 06-10-2008 06:40 PM

Nope, never ever.

Popple 06-10-2008 06:42 PM

Yes I want kids of my own more than anything in the world.
You think 1 would have put me off!!

Accidentally Abstract 06-10-2008 06:42 PM

Yes.
I don't want to physically have them myself though.

Crumple... 06-10-2008 06:58 PM

No, I don't. I don't think I could give my life to another person like that. I know I'm too selfish, and I'm the least maternal person I know, I'd just end up screwing the poor kid up more than my mum did me, ha.
I don't want to get married either, it'll just end in divorce and I could do without the legal bills.

Katiecakes. 06-10-2008 07:02 PM

Hmm, I've always had this argument with myself.
I always thought that I would be an amazing mother up until last year when I started to..yeah. So then I thought I shouldn't have children because what if I relapse when my children are old enough to realise what I'm doing? It would hurt them more than it would hurt me.
Then comes the conundrum of finding a man crazy enough to take me on. That's a whole different thing all together!
So I guess, maybe.

Zedebee 06-10-2008 07:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rawrk (Post 1132609)
Nope, never ever.


BlindSpot. 06-10-2008 07:03 PM

Yes, at some point, preferably before 35.

Ali xox

Heidi Tiger 06-10-2008 07:04 PM

No!
I'm not a fan of kids really, well some well-behaved ones are ok for a short period of time. I'd be the worlds worst mother, I can barely take care of myself most of the time. Also there are so many diseases that my genetics make a risk factor I wouldn't inflict that on a child just in case. Also as my partner say's, if you found someone who you wanted to spend the rest of your life with, why would you want to share them with a child that will take up all your time?

Feel_Good_inc. 06-10-2008 07:05 PM

I would love to have a family someday. The major hurdle is finding the right woman when you have no social skills at all.

charcoal feathers 06-10-2008 07:06 PM

Like you, i always wanted the whole, find the right man(i dont want to marry though), have my own house, have a family kind of thing.
But, like everything it never worked out like that.
I feel pregnant at 19, i had my daughter at 20.
I still live at home with my parent's, i'm not with the father of my daughter and he now has no contact with her at all (his choice)
My mind set has totally changed.
I've always wanted more then 1 child and now, i don't ever want to have another one, because i'm scared the same thing will happen again.
I love my daughter, but, i do wish, that it wasn't in these circumstances.

Kelly. 06-10-2008 07:13 PM

I want kids more than anything. Always wanted that whole happily married, good job, nice house and children thing. I can't imagine not having children some day. Just hope it works out.

Pencils 06-10-2008 07:16 PM

I never want children. And luckily I'm marrying a man who doesn't either. We have many many reasons.
I don't like children.
I don't want to have to give up my independence - with a kid you can't just go out and get drunk, or whatever, or go on particular holidays, or stay up all night, you always have to be thinking of the child.
I'm not an ambitious person, I probably won't earn lots of money, I don't want it all drained by my spawn.
I don't want to have to live my life around something who's dependant on me - I don't want pets, either.
Plus the fact that I think that the youth of today are mostly horrible, and I wouldn't want any child of mine associating with the kind of kids I see around.
Also, it would kill me if I had a child and they became ill in any way, physical or mental. I know I wouldn't be able to cope with the worry. I go spare thinking about members of my family or friends if they're ill or unhappy, and if it was my child I don't know how I'd cope. Which, you know, is a bit hypocritical, but whatever. And there's mental illness on both mine and Dave's side, so the chances would be raised. No thanks.
Also, I don't want anyone to be upset when I die. I assume I'll live longer than my husband - he's older, plus women live longer than men, so there will be no one left to miss me. I don't want any children getting agonised over me being old. Or taking my own life, or however it goes.

The thing is, I'd be a great mother. I'm the most motherly person I know. But I know I'll be entirely fulfilled by caring for my husband and my friends. I don't need more.

Well, that was long.

~KemicalRain~ 06-10-2008 07:19 PM

i want kids... i even have my names picked out for the girls and the boys :/ i always wanted the fairytale life :( but i guess i will have to wait

-Chelsey- 06-10-2008 07:19 PM

I'd love kids, after Uni once I've started my career..
I don't know if I'm physically able to.. but It's something i just know I want to do. =]

J.K 06-10-2008 07:22 PM

I'm not sure.
I've been told I'd be a great dad which is always nice to hear but it wouldn't necessarily spur me on to be one.
It depends, really. If I got to the stage where I was with some one and that's what both of us wanted and it felt right then sure, why not, but it's up in the air till then.
To summaries, I don't know.

Feel_Good_inc. 06-10-2008 07:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by zappachild (Post 1132719)
i even have my names picked out for the girls and the boys :

Yeah. Me too.

SmileOnThatFace 06-10-2008 07:52 PM

i.. kinda do....

xcept... something.. like...my hips bend inwards or something so ill end up in more pain :)

but sure... i want the responsibilty
xo

yanna 06-10-2008 08:06 PM

i'm not sure.

i'd quite like a child or children in my life for the fun stuff likey playing with and reading to them, and also to just see how they grow and develop as people.

but...
i don't think i would be able to cope with that much responsibility, and worry, and pain (emotional i mean mainly, but the physical side sure doesn't appeal either).

maybe i will ba able to become a stepmother - but a nice one.

~yanna~


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