( posted in ED forum..)
 

BMI/Numbers/Weight Triggers - I hope you dont mind.....

...but i wanted to share something. Some very bad news i got today from my GP....

because of letting the bitch of anorexia win for awhile, i now have peri-osteoarthriris.....about 25 - 30 years earlier than i should have to worry about it; if at all...

Today, having to walk just to the bus stop, was utter hell. But i HAD to go for a refil on my pain meds (for my broken shoulder originally, now for that and my back, hips, knees...near every joint. ALL because of letting myself get down to 89 pounds...i'm 5' 8", so it was quite noticeable. Ppl at my hubby's work finally asked him if i had cancer.....

All this , which will now require MORE pills, a future of pain, and eventually surgeries.

All to be thin.

All to lose 'just one more little bit....then i'll stop'.

Oh i'll stop alright...when my heart fails, which he also told me is a possibility.

How nice...i hope i look good dead to my daughter; if they have an open casket funeral...or if she comes home from school one day to find my body. I hope i look good.

Today I have FIRMLY decided something;

NO ****ING MORE!!!!

This bitch is about to be choked; choked to death on FOOD!!! GOOD, HEALTHY FOOD.

I will NOT slowly kill myself, while making my hubby and child watch.

IT ENDS NOW!!!!!!!!!!

I hope something in here will help one of you to escape her....to REALLY see what you are doing to yourself. Your beautiful, poor, hurting, aching body and soul.....

i hope.

pls be safe, pls try to fight...you CAN win.

thank you for reading.

romp




Why are we so inspired by another's courage? Maybe because it gives us the sweet and genuine surprise of discovering some trace, at least, of the same courage in ourselves.
-Laurence Shames

J: soulmate, always

You sound so determined to beat this and that's wonderful! I'm sorry about the bad news from your doctor but you have managed to turn it around into a positive because it seems to have given you the motivation and determination to get through this. I hope we can help you through this. Take care of yourself *hug*

*cuddles romp* KICK ASS GIRL! I hope you finally do kick the ass of the piece of **** disease that's ana. *pets lots and lots*

sorry about what the odctor said- you sound like such a strong person, who im sure can beat this.
*hugz*

*hugs* so sorry to hear about what the doctor had to say romp. i hope that the pain meds have / will ease your discomfort soon.

that quote in your signature is true you know...... your courage and determination to beat this is definitely felt, and i genuinely admire you so much for your strength.

keep fighting, we're all behind you!

sky xx

i am sorry that you have been diagnosed with something that is going to cause you pain.
but well done for seeing that something needs to be done before it is too late that takes a lot to say you are going to stand up to this!
if i can help i am here for you
xxx

I'm so sorry about your diagnosis romp, but well done for turning it around and seeing that you can get through this, and you will x hugs x

thank you for posting

Oh, but you are such wonderful ppl!!!!
*hugs youall*n :o)
I just ate half a choccie bar [other half for bby] and about tohave some ICE CREAM!!!!!

[neopolitin,in case ou wondered what flavor :P !!!)

romp

good stuff! i found i ate lots of yummies for the baby :)
well done you!!!!!

Oh honey, My heart goes out to you. I am so proud of you for not giving in but fighting.

I hope now they know what is wrong with you, they can give you the right medication in future.

Honey keep fighting, it will be worth it in the end. Also think what a postive role model you are showing your daughter, that you will never give up. That if your going through hell, you keep on going.

You have a lovely family to help you beat it, and I can kick you up the bum when you need it too < hehehehe >

Love you
Jade xxx

scary to hear rompers.
but YOU GO!!!
happy that you are fighting this with everything. i know how hard it is. but i also know you CAN do it.
love you.
xxxxxxxx

I'm so sorry hunny that it took such horrible news to make you realise that you need to fight this. I am sooo damn proud of you for realising that this has to stop now. You are one incredibly brave strong woman and I know you can do this. We are all here for you to support you through this, you will beat this. Take care hunny.
Kat xxx

You go Romp. I'm cheering you on!

I know about arthritis, i have it in an ankle that I don't think I would have broken except that I was overweight.