Want to cut cut cut
 

:sad:
My fiance is away for 3 days and I'm on my own. Am not coping very well, particularly since I'm having trouble with my dad. I told him last week I wanted no more contact and he keeps sending me emails saying nasty things and they're dragging me down.

Plus I rang my mum last night and she told me that she is spending half what she spent on my sister's birthday for mine. I don't care about the money, its the principle. My sister has always been the favourite.

I want to make a big cut on my arm with a blade. Am trying so hard to hold back.

heya,
where's your fiance gone? is there anyway you could get in touch with her? maybe a short phone call could lift your spirits?
that situation with your father sounds really hard & emotionally draining. could you try not checking your e-mail for the next 3 days? or long term, maybe change your e-mail address? whatever nasty things he's saying, you've got to remember that they're not true, you know who you are, don't let him bully you & make you feel so low.
the fact that you're trying to not cut shows to me just how much strength you have as a person. you can beat this. try to keep yourself distracted and get your mind of cutting. keep your hands busy, or maybe try something that always cheers you up, like watching your favourite movie, or having a friend over.
keep fighting
*squishes*

He's gone to Cornwall for 3 days. Back on Thurs.
I rang him earlier and it did help but the family stuff is so badly dragging me down. I just saw my psych nurse and she told me to ignore my dad for the time being so that I can get some perspective on the situation while talking about it in psychotherapy.
I'll ignore his calls and texts- if he bothers at all!
I've asked my friend round for a while tonight so that should help.