Blades are in the bin and so are the OD pills
 

So why do I not feel good about this. I can cope with the no pills but I feel I've lost something vital getting rid of the blades.

I've just wasted another hour with my therapist and feeling a bit crap about this too. This always has a triggering effect.

My stitches are hurting and so is my head.

Sorry

Throwing away your blades and OD pills is a huge step. I know when I threw away my blades, I stuggled for a while afterward, but I have learned to work through the urges, despite the fact that in recent months I have obtained blades again.

Throwing away your blades will take a while to get used to, but you will soon learn to adapt to not having them.

Hope this helps.

Take care, Nic.
xxx

throwing away your blades and pills is a huge step
well done- don't lose sight of how much of an achievment that is

it will feel bad for a while, as you've lost a sort of safety blanket
but just keep hold of the positive- you've thrown them away, you're recovering, well done

take care xxxx

Hey,

You have made a huge step today and ultimately I hope you're able to feel proud about it, even though at the moment you're not feeling to great.

To be fair, you've also had therapy, which is such an emotionally draining experience it could probably make any mood drop instantly.

Just for a while, be gentle with yourself, be kind and be a little bit proud - even if you don't feel it - for throwing those out, because I smiled so hard when I read the title. You've made a brilliant step, and we're all here to back you on that.

You're not alone.

Take Care,
Aimee x

Hey *Cuddles you* Thats a huge step you have taken and im so proud of you. Thats excellent! I understand your not feeling great, sorry to hear that, i do hope you feel better soon. You will feel better soon. You just need to be as gentle with yourself as you possibly can and take things in small steps a day at a time. Take it easy.

Take care best wishes Ian

How do you feel that you wasted that hour? What were you wanting, hoping for?

Wow thats a huge step to take! Well done! Im proud of you love. As others have said, it will take a while to get used to this and youll have to find other coping strategies when you feel the urge to cut. Therapy can make your mood drop a bit but its encouraging to know that youre getting some form of support. You dont need to apologise for anything hun!x! As Ian said, take it in small steps a day at a time. You are recovering! Yay! I wish you the very best of luck. Just remember that were all here for you at RYL. PM me if you ever need someone to talk to k?

Zoe x

Thanks for all your kind words

I'm a hypocrite, I threw the blades away yesterday and because of feeling so crap after seeing my psychologist I've taken them back, I will try not to use them over the week but I need to have them.

Therapy was a wast of time because I cannot communicate anything I think or feel and I'm not sure what to do with the time, there must be rules I can follow some kind of structure that I can be a part of.

I am also afraid of it getting somewhere because then it will end

Does your therapist help you communicate when things feel so frozen and blocked? What might help you at times like those?

She usually takes over and just asks me questions. I become very stressed and panicked by silence so she tries not to leave me too long before continuing and so the conversation just seams to revolve around the mundane and never gets anywhere

You totally just took a huge step!
I tried to throw away what I use (Sadly its a piece of a broken mirror), but when I did, I wound up digging it out of the trash 10 minutes later.

I don't think any time with a therapist is a waste of time. They are there to help you.
Although I agree, sometimes they trigger me to want to cut even more.

Just keep the faith sweetie, like I said, you took a huge step!

Maybe in time you'll feel you reach a place where you feel safe enough to tolerate a quiet space, and together you can explore the feelings that arise. My therapist works a lot with what's known as 'body process' with me, and I find that really helps me just to be with myself in the moment and hold how I'm feeling in connection with her.

I've failed I bought dressings today

well done!! tht's sooooo awesome!!
it IS the biggest step to stopping, seriously this is awesome!!!
i only managed to give mine to my friend.... =(
but well done nd hope all goes well!