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Honestly, why?
Ok, well, recently i've been wanting to take my own life, i don't know why, i understand all this stuff about how much pain you can cope with to how much pain you're in, apart from my family and work i'm ok, but recently i've been wanting to step infront of a moving car, or just end it peacfully, i fucking hate that i'm feeling like this, honestly, why??
There's a big difference between suicidal thoughts and acting upon them, but i've had them a few days and they're only getting worse, i don't know what's next. I'l be honest, the only reason i haven't, is because of a few friends and most importantly RYL friends... How they'd cope, my family doesn't fall in anywhere in the equation, if they feel sad i'm dead, at least they're feeling something other then hate towards me, i don't know, i don't know why i'm feeling like this, or how to stop it, my mindset at the moment is "Nothing is better then feeling like shit - Even if there's light at the end of the tunnel" At this point, i don't care about the future, i want to sort now out, and that's not going to happen, so what's the point? I've read all the suicide pages, and they're just not helping, i don't know what else to do. Sorry for the burden, you dont even need to reply, there's no answer avaliable. |
Hey, don't apologise.
You're allowed to feel like this. PM me? I'm happy to chat to you if you need to talk... Take care. Love Rhiannon xxx |
Hi sorry your feeling like this but walking infront a moving car would not be ending it peacefully you could end up with broken bones and then have to deal with people asking why i know you said you don't care about thre light at the end of the tunnel but just think as far into the future as you can and imagine yourself happy and free from everything that makes you feel suicidal and how perfect it would all be your not a burden but as many people say just don't give up it will get better!
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I've sat and thought about it, it honestly doesn't appeal to me, i said this to Rhiannon, "obviously at this moment and time i don't want to die, i always said to myself if i was 100% going to do it, then i'd do it, not post anywhere or ask for help, and leave a note to let the people i want to know, to know. So if i wanted to truley kill myself i'd be dead now, but it's getting to that stage really fast :( The line between suicidal thoughts and acting on it is getting thinner and thinner."
I'm just sick of everything, and it doesn't seem to be getting better, and in my mindset i dont even want it to, i just want everything to end. Sorry for the waste of space of a post, i dont know what i even wanted from it, it doesn't matter :( |
I know your feeling bad, and i wish i could help. Youve helped me loads, i would have tried to kill myself last week if you hadnt have been on msn. Your a lovely, funny person, and i really dont wanna lose you. you can text me whenever you feel bad and il try and help.
loads of love xxxxxxxxxxx |
I really wish there was more I could do.
Please try to stay strong. You know I'm here if you ever need to talk xxxxx |
I'm feeling slightly better, i also took an "Oath" with HappyDays (AKA Sian my stalker) And she's stopped for a few weeks, and is stopping till next wednesday, so i am as well, a week and a half, it'l be hard for me, but i can try :) :)
Still got really strong urges just to end it :( But i'm supressing them as much as possible. |
im really glad your feeling better :)
I think its awesome you wanna stop cos i am for a while, but ive tol you on msn, if you need to cut or cant stop it doesnt matter. Il help you all the way, but were different people, and im building on stopping for 2 weeks, however far you get its a huge step, even thinking bout stopping is a huge step:) xxx |
Yea, i just need someone to stop with to be honest :$ Because then it adds to wanting to stop, and i want to try and see if i can last that long :/ I'm hoping i can :) :) So yea, i know you'd support me either way, but i want to try and quit for a while :) Thanks for the motivation :)
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im really sorry i wasnt here yesterday for you *hugs*
im glad people were here to help you though =) you can get through this, i know you can, you just have to keep fighting so many people care about you, and would hate for anything to happen to you. good luck with stopping =) stay safe luv saz xxxx |
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