I really hate myself right now
 

So I just had this really REALLY big binge... bigger than I think I've ever had... and the sad thing is I'm still f***ing hungry!!!!
I can't make my brain shut up... it is saying PURGE PURGE PURGE you know you want to... it'll make you feel better... you are such loser... how could you be so stupid?!?! PURGE PURGE PURGE!!!!!! And it's like I can literally hear myself throwing up in my head... does that make sense?
My gag sensation is really f***ing bad right now!!!


Somebody plz help me... I don't wanna purge... I don't... I am sick of living my life this way!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*snuggles you*
im so sorry.
i dont have much experience with binging and purging.
maybe try just going to sleep just to let your mind rest and your food digest.
im sorry if im no help.
someone will come along with something helpful, im sure.
i see you posted over 2 hours ago, but this time of night RYL is quite slow, so just try and give it time.
thinking of you.
much love.
xxxxxxxxxx

I don't have any experience with it either but I want to send you some *hugs* and hope you feel better today. At least you've admitted that you're sick of living your life this way - that's a big step towards recovery. Have you spoken to anyone about getting some help with it? Hope you're okay hun

I'm afraid my response is the same as the two above - I haven't any experience of it and would be worried to say the wrong thing. But I just wanted you to know I am thinking of you and sending you strength.
Hugs, Katch xxx

How are you feeling now sweetie? Did anything in particular this off for you? Sorry my response is a little late, all I can suggest is trying to distract yourself by going for a walk? playing music? watching a movie? reading a book? posting on here? Sometimes writing down all your thoughts and feelings can be really helpful too. Feel free to PM me if you need to talk more. Take care
Kat xxx

No experience or wise advice.
*gives you a hug*

*Big hugs* I dont have any experience but i wanted you to know that i care and that we are all here for you. Please dont think that you have to go through this alone. Are you able to talk to us some more about what it is thats caused this? Do you have any support at all? Did something trigger you? Here is the big distractions list that has other distractions you can try http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum...ead.php?t=1403 i hope you feel better soon. Please take care of yourself.

Take care best wishes Ian xxxxxxxxx

** update**

I did it!!!! I managed not to purge!!!! :hehe::hop:Maybe there is hope for me after all!!!! :laugh:

There sure is hope for you - weldone - I know it's not been easy but that was a huge step to take - right now I think you should right down your thoughts on how good/ proud you feel for not purging this time - then next time you feel you should purge, sit and read it through lots of times until you know you can get by. Proud of you - you have proved you can do it - so keep on being strong. Hugs xxxx

Yay, well done! That's really good to hear! Katch's idea sounds like a good one. It would be good motivation I think.

Hey Amanda... Well done sweetie, I'm very proud of you! & you should be too xxx

Well done sweetie, I am proud of you

Well done for not purging, that's brilliant!

Have you thought about why you binged? Had something upset you, or made you feel lost, angry, alone, etc? Most eating "issues" (for lack of a better word, sorry) will never completely go away until the issues surrounding them have been looked into.

What I did when I felt like binging recently was keep a lot of fresh, already prepared (so I cut an apple into bitesize chunks, etc - kinda like a fruit salad) in the fridge. That's the first thing I ate, and you can have as much as you like without having to feel guilty about it. I also play the 15 minute game with myself - as in, I'm allowed to eat one (or two, depending on how desperate I am to binge) thing every 15 minutes. It helps me gain control
over myself.

I'm sorry if the above things aren't very helpful, but I'm glad you didn't purge :)

Chelsea x