What the hell. (long and rambling)
 

So I went to visit my mom for mothers day today, and while I was there, my boyfriend and my mom's boyfriend went out and cleaned up the yard for her. Everything seemed cool, but then on the way home, my boyfriend slipped in at the end of our conversation, "Oh yeah. And Chris (my mom's boyfriend) wanted me to tell you that your mom is having a hysterectomy next week because she got diagnosed with cancer. But it's probably not a big deal, cause your mom didn't want him to tell anyone. That's why he had me tell you instead."

WTF. NOT A BIG DEAL? MY MOM HAS CANCER!

So not only am I freaked out, but also kind of pissed that my boyfriend is just tossing it into conversation like it was something he read in the newspaper. And then comes that fact that my mom didn't even want to tell me, and now I have to decide what to do because I know that if she didn't tell me, then she obviously hasn't told my brother and sister. Should I even tell them? Should that be up to my mom? Should I even tell her I know? How am I supposed to just pretend I don't know anything about this?!

I already have so much **** going on, this is the last thing I need on my mind right now. Anyone who can relate, I could use some advice please!

Yeah, I know the whole world isn't against me. But it sure feels like that sometimes.

And for the record, I didn't react badly at all. Whenever people tell me something really horrible, I tend to calmly ask a few questions, and then drop the subject. Not until I get somewhere by myself do I freak out and cry and get angry and stuff. So my mom has no reason to believe I'd have a bad reaction. My sister and my brother are the ones who really have a fit about things. So maybe she didn't want to tell me because she thought I'd tell them?

Also, just found out her surgery is TOMORROW. I want to send her flowers or something even though I'm not supposed to know. I just don't want her to feel all alone.