Talking to strangers on the internet
 

I have over ten friends on the internet, but just two or three in real life. Most of these internet friends are twice my age and half of them are male.

My Mum: They are paedophiles. They're grooming you.
Me: I'm 18 years old; paedophiles are not interested in 18 year olds.

Who do you think is right here?

I mean, internet safety that is taught in school is completely over the top and overrated.

I haven't given out personal details to these people. They just know I'm from London.

i hate to inform you some people are, but not everyone is. It doesnt matter what age you are people can still look for sex over the internet.

Internet safty is a big thing, so at least you havent told anyone any deatials, you wouldnt bevlieve how easy it is to trace people with a few bits of information.

But the majority of people are genuine, its just a few that give the internet a bad name

I think your both wrong.
Basically.

You don't really know who these people are,or why someone twice your age has decided to befriend you,but at the same time sure,they might be perfectly nice people.

Safety's not over-rated if it stops someone getting hurt,regardless of you thinking it's stupid or not.

You're 18,you can make your own decisions,but your mum's probably just worried about you. Which really, is understandable.

Fair enough. I'm just a loner in real life, so internet friends are an attractive option.

I was listening to a show on the radio last night where a huge number of people were saying how they'd had men saying things they didn't want them to/requesting things of them that they didnt want over the net. It was a huge number of people that were saying this happened and yeah maybe paedo's wouldn't be interested but they there's perverts, many of whom can be just as dangerous to an individual and though it isnt underage you it doesn't make it right.

I'm not saying it will definately happen, just that you shouldn't trust these men/ let your guard drop as this could be when you get hurt. Keep on not giving out personal details and be careful who you talk to and you should be fine though so long as you make sure any conversation doesn't go too far and they make you do stuf you're uncomfortable with.

You have a good point. Although I've known these people for months and months and they haven't come out with anything odd/worrying. But I am aware of the dangers.

I have met many people online inc my last g/f. I am sure to be safe. I have only met in groups or in very public place with people knowing where I am.

I am careful to what people know of me when I talk online to strangers.

But I rather that than go into a pub/club and meet someone who is possibly drunk etc.

I talk to a few people, and weirdly i feel i can tell them pretty much lots of stuff, and im certain they are genuine

*huggles*
xx

i think your mum is right, espically as they are twice ur age.. its okay just talking to them online and thats it.. i mean im 21, and i dont talk to people that are more than 5 years older than me, just to be on the safe side..
do you think its okay that a 21 year old male, talks to a 17/18 year old male?

I talk to people in their 20s, 30s, 40s even 50s. I don't really have a sense of danger. I talk to people from all walks of life.

Same here.

hindenberg I'd say yes considering I'm 18 and my real life boyfriend (ok we met here) but now live together is 21 turning 22 this year I turn 19 at the end of the year.

Didnt mean to hijack your thread steel maiden but yeah just making a point. I do think you have to be careful who you talk to though.

and you don't find it odd/creepy that a 40 year old man wants to be friends with an 18 year old girl over the internet?
because i do.


your mum is worried about you, and i think she has good reason to, actually.

just wanted to say that internet safety really isn't over-rated. if thats your opnion then fine. but WHAT IF something happened becuase you didn't take precaustion. and i realise you can't life your life with WHAT IF's. but the internet offers accress to so many times, and unfortunatly not everyone's intentions are good.

you're mum is probably worries. which is understandable really.

and, i don't mean this in offensive way, but, it sounds as though you arn't particularly btoered by it?

all i really want to say in this post is just to stay safe, really.

take care

You just have to be careful and don't share too much personal information. That being said I met my current gf thru a chatroom. So it doesn't always have to turn out bad.

Marte

No I don't find it creepy. They are more supportive than my "friends" in real life. In fact I've given two of them my mobile number. I find it great.

It's great that they're supportive of you, and you've got friends who you can talk to - the internet isn't necessarily a bad thing, and there are genuine, caring people out there (I know I've got some good 'friends' on the internet, even though I've not met them in real life, and mostly likely never will :)).

But talking to men in their 20s/30s/40s/50s could be potentially dangerous. I imagine there are a lot of men who would avoid talking to an 18-year-old girl, just because of the way it could look. Yes, they could be very nice, genuine people, but they could also be grooming you, or whatever - the danger of the internet is that you just don't know who you are actually talking to sometimes.

Sorry if this sounds patronising.

Well, if you're 18 you ought to be smart and mature enough to know when someone is "grooming" you for something other than an internet friendship. If you haven't given out personal details to these people you don't know there's not a problem, in my opinon. I have some people on my messenger who I don't know in real life but I know they're not pedophiles because I talk to them and can tell the difference and because I'm an adult. You're old enough to see when someone is being creepy or trying to get information out of you or has an ulterior motive and when you see this you just block and delete them and voila, problem solved.

But you're way too old for a pedophile anyway, the worst that could happen is that you have someone in that list of people who would want to get with you sexually and use you in that way and nothing more...but a pedo would have dropped you once he knew you're 18 years old. They won't waste time "grooming" an already legal and grown girl. There are pedos that like little girls and those who like pre-teens and teenagers (12, 13, 14 etc.) you're past their range. Don't worry.

Thanks.
I know that paedophiles like younger girls. They aren't interested in girls who have past their puberty anyway.
At least these internet friends keep me going at times when my real life friends let me down.

As long as they give you support and are of benifit to you I can't see anything wrong in that. Personally I think if you're careful then you can meet some really great people online although many people are apprehensive with good reason (grooming etc) but it's just a tool I guess people can use it for good or bad. I met my husband online so I feel it's a great thing if you use it right.