Nervous *SI trig maybe* UPDATE!!
 

So after not working for a few months, I finally got the courage to apply for a job. The more I think about it, the more excited I get. I also get more nervous though. What if I don't get it? I'm stressing myself so much and I want to cut really bad. I haven't cut in over three months. I just hate that I know the relief will come if I cut. I can just feel the urge building up and wanting to take over.

ergh! I suck!
Hugs? High fives? Kisses?

Would a massive congratulations and good luck message work?

It's bound to be stressful, and full of anx-citement...

*hugs*
it is a really great thing that you have done, applying for a job, you should feel so proud of yourself, try to keep distracted, and think of how good you are gonna feel if you get the job!!!

Ah suppose im a bit emotional too. Both your messages made me tear up. Thank you both

hey, how are you doing now? Congratulations on being nearly 3 months free!! That really is an amazing achievement! Applying for a job is always stressful etc at the best of times even when you haven't been out of the market for a few months but it is an amazing step to take and so positive.
Stay strong
xx

Job hunting is so scary. Awesome that you made it to three months.
High five. Hug.

Thank you guys. I'm still really nervous and overwhelmed, but I think I can get through this. I just don't know what i'll do if I dont get this job. I really want it.

I hope you get the job hun,
And well done on 3 months SI free, thats awesome
You can fight the urges hun,
Im here if you want to talk
Love Lora xx

Thank you. I still haven't heard anything, but Im hopeful.

I got an interview!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Im so so excited. I really screwed up the cover letter I sent to this job, but I still got an interview! It's for a marketing assistant at a nearby shopping center. It's on monday so wish me luck and I will keep you guys updated!

Even better because today is 4 months cut free for me!

woop woop!

Congratulations on getting the interview. I hope it goes really well for you. Well done on 4 months cut free, that is brilliant.
Best of luck for Monday.
Take care Xx

Thank you both! I really want this so I hope it goes well.

good luck! But I do have some input. It's very hard for me not to cut for things that happen at work. In fact, it's the hardest thing for me. But I promised myself (and my boss) I wouldn't let my job get to me like that. Interviewing is stressful. Try to journal or something to help...that's what I try to do.

Thanks for the advice. I took your advice and journaled a little before the interview. I did want to cut pretty bad before the interview, but I managed to force myself to walk around instead. It really helped me a lot.

So the interview was yesterday and it went really well. I was the first person she interviewed so she is doing more this week. I should find out next week though, so keep thinking of me and cross your fingers for me!

Thanks again for all th support!

*fingers crossed* and congrats for not cutting!!

I didn't get the job. She said i was qualified, but she went with the person who she thought was the best for the job. She said I had a bright future in marketing.

I didnt get it. I didn't get it.

You didnt get it yes, but ,you made a massive step forwards by trying to get it. That is a really important thing to try and hold on to.
Congratulations for being brave enough to try. You should be proud of yourself. I know that the outcome wasnt what you wanted, but please don't shut yourself away once more- you did so well!! :-)
k x

Thank you. Means a lot, really!
Tbh I feel pretty worthless right now. Im trying to be positive. I thought I did really well. I don't want to shut myself out. Im trying really hard not to and trying even harder no to slip into SI.

si will not help AT ALL
si is like this tricky sneaky bastard that lies to you and says it will help you but after you are done you feel weak and worse and all of your problems are still there

hey, you didnt get this job, but you were close and you got an interview so now you know for sure that you are qualified and you can do it! out there there is a job for you. dont give up. you are smart and eloquent and you can do it! the unqualified people don't even get the interviews and you got one!!