help friend problem
 

god where is chat when you need it? why must my buisness be a public affair?
we had this conversation between my friend and me and i hope this doesn't break any rule s but i just want some perspective on wheter i'm wrong or what my head is so messed up i can't think straight. i don't know what is going on i'm A shes 13


why did you tell her you couldn't be her friend anymore?
A (6/7/2007 3:53:47 AM): we need to stop talking now
A(6/7/2007 3:53:59 AM): seriously cause we're just gonna fight
A (6/7/2007 3:54:21 AM): and that is none of your buisness first off
A(6/7/2007 3:54:36 AM): so good night kat talk to you friday
13 (6/7/2007 3:54:45 AM): wait a minute
13 (6/7/2007 3:54:54 AM): i don't want to fight with you
13 (6/7/2007 3:55:05 AM): thats not what i'm trying to do
13 (6/7/2007 3:55:21 AM): i'm just curious as to what you're trying to pull now?
A (6/7/2007 3:55:37 AM): pull?
13 (6/7/2007 3:56:05 AM): yeah
13 (6/7/2007 3:56:18 AM): you have been in one of your "funks"
13 (6/7/2007 3:56:20 AM): why?
13 (6/7/2007 3:56:30 AM): you not getting enough attention again/
13 (6/7/2007 3:56:32 AM): ?
13 (6/7/2007 3:57:08 AM): and why did you think me asking you that question ment we were gonna fight?
13 (6/7/2007 3:57:19 AM): unless you start any fighting there will be none
13 (6/7/2007 3:57:34 AM): i'm just a curious little mind
A (6/7/2007 3:57:38 AM): this is of none of your business
13 (6/7/2007 3:57:51 AM): so why would it cause us to fight?
A(6/7/2007 3:57:55 AM): i'm telling you nicely please drop it
13 (6/7/2007 3:58:01 AM): why?
13 (6/7/2007 3:58:15 AM): you've told me the same thing b4
13 (6/7/2007 3:58:24 AM): and you never told me why you said that
13 (6/7/2007 3:58:40 AM): so now that i'm not the only one i would like to know why you say these things
13 (6/7/2007 3:58:51 AM): so i believe it is partialy my business
13 (6/7/2007 3:59:09 AM): so if not to than why to me?
13 (6/7/2007 3:59:18 AM): to her*
A (6/7/2007 3:59:38 AM): this is none of your damn business kat
A (6/7/2007 3:59:52 AM): back off
13 (6/7/2007 3:59:57 AM): why?
13 (6/7/2007 4:00:01 AM): what if i don't?
13 (6/7/2007 4:00:45 AM): why did you "try" to kill yourself again?
13 (6/7/2007 4:00:55 AM): where di you do it?
13 (6/7/2007 4:00:58 AM): did*
13 (6/7/2007 4:01:09 AM): was it in a lethal spot?
A (6/7/2007 4:01:13 AM): wtf are you talking about?
13 (6/7/2007 4:01:14 AM): or not?
13 (6/7/2007 4:01:27 AM): when you had to go to the hospital
A(6/7/2007 4:01:48 AM): that was over two weeks ago
13 (6/7/2007 4:02:00 AM): yeah and you never fineshed telling me about it
A (6/7/2007 4:02:12 AM): and i don;'t really wnat to
13 (6/7/2007 4:02:18 AM): why?
A(6/7/2007 4:02:23 AM): cause
13 (6/7/2007 4:02:31 AM): not a good enough answer
13 (6/7/2007 4:02:46 AM): where did you do it?
13 (6/7/2007 4:02:55 AM): how did they know you did it?
A (6/7/2007 4:02:56 AM): wtf does it matter
13 (6/7/2007 4:03:06 AM): did they find you almost bleed to death?
A (6/7/2007 4:03:16 AM): seriously back off
13 (6/7/2007 4:03:17 AM): or did you run to your mother for help?
13 (6/7/2007 4:03:24 AM): no
A (6/7/2007 4:03:29 AM): yes
13 (6/7/2007 4:03:40 AM): why?
A(6/7/2007 4:04:00 AM): because i'm not talking to you about this
13 (6/7/2007 4:04:04 AM): why?
13 (6/7/2007 4:04:15 AM): you'd talk to me any other time
13 (6/7/2007 4:04:19 AM): why not now?
A (6/7/2007 4:04:21 AM): becasue i'm not dealing with it tonoght
13 (6/7/2007 4:04:28 AM): i say you will
13 (6/7/2007 4:04:34 AM): cuz i want to know
13 (6/7/2007 4:04:40 AM): i need to know
A(6/7/2007 4:04:49 AM): you do not need to know
13 (6/7/2007 4:05:03 AM): don't tell me what i do and do not need
13 (6/7/2007 4:05:13 AM): why did you do it?
13 (6/7/2007 4:05:23 AM): what was your end goal?
13 (6/7/2007 4:05:36 AM): did you need to punish yourself?
13 (6/7/2007 4:05:43 AM): did you want to die?
A(6/7/2007 4:05:43 AM): and uh ha ha you say i will? no i'm sorry but you won't
13 (6/7/2007 4:05:50 AM): did you need attention?
A (6/7/2007 4:06:05 AM): seriously kat not tonight
13 (6/7/2007 4:06:09 AM): why?
A(6/7/2007 4:06:36 AM): becasue it ios not exatcly easy to do this tonight
13 (6/7/2007 4:06:46 AM): no night is easy for you
13 (6/7/2007 4:07:13 AM): so tonight is perfect a night to talk about it
A(6/7/2007 4:07:26 AM): that doesn't make anyn sense so i'm disregarding it
13 (6/7/2007 4:07:44 AM): no you're just choosing to ignore it
A (6/7/2007 4:07:57 AM): yeah so
13 (6/7/2007 4:08:50 AM): so now that i know i am not the only one you told at one point that you couldn't be there friend anymore, tell me why you told me
13 (6/7/2007 4:09:08 AM): **** why you told alliese
13 (6/7/2007 4:09:17 AM): why did you tell me?
A (6/7/2007 4:10:41 AM): thats was another time kat and your taking this thing with aliese and making it your chance to bring up **** again
A (6/7/2007 4:10:56 AM): please don't not now not ever
13 (6/7/2007 4:11:17 AM): no actually it was a question that slipped my mind and this convientiantly reminded me
A (6/7/2007 4:12:41 AM): window of opportunity closed sorry hun
13 (6/7/2007 4:13:00 AM): stop calling me huh
13 (6/7/2007 4:13:05 AM): hun*
13 (6/7/2007 4:13:15 AM): like some old lady
A(6/7/2007 4:13:41 AM): stop asking me questions taht i tell you repeatedly to drop
13 (6/7/2007 4:13:49 AM): um no
13 (6/7/2007 4:14:01 AM): why is it so important that i drop them?
13 (6/7/2007 4:14:12 AM): cuz you don't want to tell me the truth?
A(6/7/2007 4:14:28 AM): no cause i don't want to deal with you
13 (6/7/2007 4:14:35 AM): with me?
13 (6/7/2007 4:14:43 AM): i am not the hard one to deal with
A (6/7/2007 4:14:54 AM): withthe whole situation
13 (6/7/2007 4:15:03 AM): what situation?
A (6/7/2007 4:15:25 AM): talking about this tonight
13 (6/7/2007 4:15:32 AM): omg
13 (6/7/2007 4:15:38 AM): you are such a ****ing cry baby
13 (6/7/2007 4:15:50 AM): it really is your way or no way huh?
A(6/7/2007 4:15:59 AM): and you are so much more mature
A (6/7/2007 4:16:11 AM): throwing insults
13 (6/7/2007 4:16:19 AM): no just agrivation
13 (6/7/2007 4:16:32 AM): if you were in front of me i'd punch you in the face
13 (6/7/2007 4:16:41 AM): its the same thing
A (6/7/2007 4:16:53 AM): oh so your aggrevated and just saying random hurtful things
A(6/7/2007 4:17:00 AM): ok
13 (6/7/2007 4:17:28 AM): i was right about you
A (6/7/2007 4:17:35 AM): so ok i'm going
13 (6/7/2007 4:26:23 AM): back so soon?
A(6/7/2007 4:27:11 AM): i'm not tired i'm not gonna go sit in my room and bore myself just cause i don;t want tio deal with this tonight
13 (6/7/2007 4:27:28 AM): i knew you'd be back
13 (6/7/2007 4:27:41 AM): just for that reason
A (6/7/2007 4:27:50 AM): i bore easly everyone knows that
13 (6/7/2007 4:28:48 AM): so you care to talk to me now?
A(6/7/2007 4:29:39 AM): as long as we don't fight and we aren't throwing insluts at eachother like 5th grders
13 (6/7/2007 4:30:37 AM): i tried that aproach earlier
13 (6/7/2007 4:30:45 AM): you wanted non of it then
13 (6/7/2007 4:30:52 AM): but now its your idea it works
13 (6/7/2007 4:30:54 AM): ok
A(6/7/2007 4:31:51 AM): i wanted to avoid the whole thing
13 (6/7/2007 4:32:05 AM): well to bad
13 (6/7/2007 4:32:09 AM): and you know that
A (6/7/2007 4:32:14 AM): um ok'
13 (6/7/2007 4:32:35 AM): i'm not some piss ant that will back off when you say sit boy
A(6/7/2007 4:33:34 AM): i realize that iand it was never about you obeying me just thought u'd have the decency to respect my boundaries
A (6/7/2007 4:34:01 AM): \when i said no for you to stop cause it hurt me
13 (6/7/2007 4:34:02 AM): you don't repsect mine
A(6/7/2007 4:34:17 AM): ok kat
13 (6/7/2007 4:34:49 AM): you are gonna break down right now and tell me why you are the way you are
(6/7/2007 4:36:48 AM): uhh huh?
13 (6/7/2007 4:37:25 AM): see i don't think you're crazy at all
13 (6/7/2007 4:37:35 AM): i think you know exactly what you're doing
13 (6/7/2007 4:37:39 AM): and why
13 (6/7/2007 4:37:51 AM): but see thats what i can't figure out
A (6/7/2007 4:37:53 AM): uh thats good that you don't think i'm crazy
13 (6/7/2007 4:37:56 AM): the why
13 (6/7/2007 4:39:05 AM): so tell my why you feel the need to manipulate everyone and everything?
A (6/7/2007 4:39:31 AM): tell me what i'mm manipulating
13 (6/7/2007 4:40:59 AM): everything arounf you
13 (6/7/2007 4:41:03 AM): around*
A (6/7/2007 4:41:25 AM): idk what i'm manipulating so i can't answer that
13 (6/7/2007 4:41:40 AM): come on allison
13 (6/7/2007 4:41:54 AM): tell me why you did what you did
13 (6/7/2007 4:42:02 AM): that will help you answer that question
13 (6/7/2007 4:42:15 AM): it'll help me answer that question really
13 (6/7/2007 4:42:23 AM): same thing really
A (6/7/2007 4:43:42 AM): why i did what? wtf did i do?
13 (6/7/2007 4:44:02 AM): why did you have to take that last trip to the hospital?
A (6/7/2007 4:44:13 AM): cause i cut
A (6/7/2007 4:44:20 AM): you know that
13 (6/7/2007 4:44:24 AM): yeah i know
13 (6/7/2007 4:44:30 AM): so why'd you do it?
A (6/7/2007 4:44:38 AM): why does it matter
A(6/7/2007 4:44:51 AM): what will you gain from knowing?
13 (6/7/2007 4:45:03 AM): it will help to answer that question
13 (6/7/2007 4:45:08 AM): ok better question
A (6/7/2007 4:45:15 AM): how?
13 (6/7/2007 4:45:22 AM): how did they know you needed help?
A (6/7/2007 4:45:46 AM): why the heel is that important?
A(6/7/2007 4:45:52 AM): hell*
13 (6/7/2007 4:46:01 AM): just tell me
A (6/7/2007 4:46:08 AM): tell me why?
13 (6/7/2007 4:46:30 AM): i told you it will help me answer that question
A(6/7/2007 4:47:05 AM): no kat i'm not answering that
13 (6/7/2007 4:47:21 AM): i'll just ask your mother
13 (6/7/2007 4:47:29 AM): as a concerned friend she'll have to tell me
A (6/7/2007 4:48:30 AM): shell tell you exactly what i'm telling you it is sometihng personal and prefered to kepp private
13 (6/7/2007 4:48:59 AM): your so ****ed up
13 (6/7/2007 4:49:17 AM): and thats not any nae calling
A (6/7/2007 4:49:19 AM): no your just frustrated
13 (6/7/2007 4:49:21 AM): name*
13 (6/7/2007 4:49:26 AM): no
13 (6/7/2007 4:49:30 AM): i'm perfectly calm
13 (6/7/2007 4:49:53 AM): and you enjoy this **** cuz I can't figure you out
A (6/7/2007 4:49:58 AM): so what ok i'm "****ed up"
13 (6/7/2007 4:50:07 AM): no i know what you are
13 (6/7/2007 4:50:19 AM): what I want you to admit it
A(6/7/2007 4:50:29 AM): figur me out? why are you trying to figure me out///?
13 (6/7/2007 4:51:38 AM): i want you to tell me that you pull all this **** for attention and to make everyone around you as unhappy as you are and i also think on a sertan level you want to make your mom suffer for not being there for you when you were little
13 (6/7/2007 4:52:12 AM): you're like a living version of that little girl from silent hill
A (6/7/2007 4:52:42 AM): ha that girl was the devil kat
A(6/7/2007 4:52:52 AM): but kinda cool
13 (6/7/2007 4:53:18 AM): no you're not the devil
13 (6/7/2007 4:53:29 AM): but i think you wish you were
A (6/7/2007 4:54:30 AM): ha ujmm no
13(6/7/2007 4:55:15 AM): can't you just be honest with me for like 5 mins?
A(6/7/2007 4:58:03 AM): i can
13 (6/7/2007 4:58:14 AM): ok
13 (6/7/2007 4:58:14 AM): start
A(6/7/2007 4:58:24 AM): but i'm not telling you anything i don;'t want to
13 (6/7/2007 5:00:04 AM): i don't believe you
A (6/7/2007 5:00:16 AM): huh?
13 (6/7/2007 5:00:44 AM): huh?
13 (6/7/2007 5:00:54 AM): whats so hard to understand about that?
A (6/7/2007 5:02:05 AM): what you don;'t believe
13 (6/7/2007 5:03:04 AM): sorry i misunderstoon what you said
A (6/7/2007 5:03:42 AM): its ok
13 (6/7/2007 5:04:00 AM): its getting to late to give a **** anymore
13 (6/7/2007 5:04:13 AM): i've tired of the subject
A (6/7/2007 5:04:34 AM): ok
13 (6/7/2007 5:04:42 AM): another day I will break open your head and find what I'm looking for in your soup of a mind
A (6/7/2007 5:04:54 AM): hehe ok






i don't kow wat happening and am i really to blame

Please, summarise the information in that lengthy chat log, and it will be easier (not to mention quicker) for us all to formulate a reply.

I think you should stop talking to this girl she seems vicious, childish and doesnt seem to understand self harm or respect your personal problems. I would say block her etc/ ignore her if you see her. It isnt your fault but she gets encouraged by the fact you reply. It has nothing to do with her unless you wish to tell her but I can't see why you would. She's just a bully who needs to grow up.
Take care
PM me if you feel the need
Tearjerker x

I agree with this post. She doesn't sound like she's worth your time, if she disrespects you like that

She reminds me of one of my "friends" from highschool. She doesn't remotely understand the nature of self harm and just wants something to gossip about I'm sure. I'd stop talking to her. She clearly makes you feel like total crap and that's not good. You were in no way wrong, hun. If she can't honor your boundaries then she isn't a friend. You aren't obligated to tell anyone anything that you aren't comfortable with and she should respect that. She's just acting like a 5 year old who was told they couldn't have a cookie and wouldn't let it go.

I read the conversation but obviously don't know the full story. But she reminds me of a friend I had in school. There was no need for her to act like that towards you. I could understand if she was concerned and wanted to know so she could help you but it seems like the way she's going about asking you things the wrong way and saying you're doing things for attention, it's just wrong of her to say that.

She really doesn't seem worth your time. I'm sure you deserve better friends than that. If you don't want to talk about things that's up to you, she can't make you. I'm sure if you did ever want to talk to her or anyone else you would. But don't let anyone force you :)

Some of what she says is aggressive, but I've got a friend like that and I'm sooooo greatful that I have her. She lets me talk to her about everything :) Once I told her everything she was fantastic! She used to be very agressive- but now I've talked to her and explained things through shes the most wonderful person! Shes only asking cos she cares.