Word Vomit
 

I'm in a state,
i dont know why
im just in a stupid state of desperation.
I dont know what to do with myself,
ive binged and purged,
ive cut so i havent made 1month free....
i doubt i ever will.
My councellor hasnt bpthered getting in touch even after i made a complaint about her, she said she would be in touch. Its been nearly 2months.
I keep pacing up and dpown, punching the walls, crying, banging around.
The people in the flat below will probably come and complain in a mintue.
I dont know what the hell to do...i cant think straight, everything is so messed up in my head right now.
I cant even explain how i feel properly, i cant understand why im feeling like this.
:crying:

Try to keep yourself distracted, although I know it's not easy when you're feeling like that. Just because you didn't make 1 month free this time doesn't mean you never will. You need to keep trying. It's good that you managed to be free for any amount of time- it's still an achievement and slipping up doesn't mean that you've failed. Try to take it one day at a time.
Maybe try getting in touch with your councellor yourself? Or try to get another councellor?
I'm sorry I can't help more, but keep talking if it helps. I'm always here xxx

Hey there *hugs* first of all try to calm down, take lots of deep breaths and maybe put on some soothing music etc. Try and get in touch with your counicllor, she could just be overloaded with work etc. Maybe try and get a new one if you can if you feel she is inaddequate at haelping you?

Trying to stop cutting is a major achivment in it self, any length of time of trying not to cut is an achivment. It took me many attempts to make one month free so dont feel to bad *hugs* Key to recovery is taking baby steps which can be frustrating.

thanks guys,
I'm not going to bother calling my councellor...i dont see the point in sitting and trying to talk to her. I cant trust her anyway because she has messed me around so much...im feeling a little better now...thankyou so much for your replies.
*squishes*
Gemz x

Hey, Maybe a walk out in the fresh air might help. Being inside can be a bit enclosed. Although councellors can help this one seems like she is more hassle than help. See what you can do and get by not seeing her because if you dont get on its going to be hard anyway. Then if you still think councelling would be of help ask to see another one, it is your right.

Take care, I'm glad your feeling a bit better. *Cuddles you anyway*

X Marie X