can i have some hugs?
 

this mourning i i had to get a well womans exam and i freaked out i was so scared but i did try to do it but it was so awful!!!!!! i cried and kept remebering what they did to me and kept on yelling "no no!!!" and then they stopped and talked to the staff person who was with me about next time puting me under annasthesia but i dont want to go through that even if im asleep to do it!!!!! they are taking my right of refuseful away from me!!!:crying: :crying: i need some safe hugs!!! :crying: :crying:

I don't think they are intending to take your right of refusal away from you, more trying to come up with a less invasive and traumatic way to perform the procedure.

I'm sorry it was so traumatic for you. Hope you take care of yourself.

but that experience was enough to where i dont want it done ever even if im alseep!!!! *cries*

You can still refuse it. They aren't taking that choice away from you at all.

Hope you are feeling better today.

i am sort of....

good.

i found out while i was with my other docoter this mourning that im going to have a well womans exam in i think october (but im not sure if its october or november!!!!!!) I DONT WANT IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :crying:

have you told them?

The doctor already knew that I don’t want it……. The staff that was with me told her to try and get me to comply with the well woman’s exam!

Have you asked why they are so insisted on you having the exam?

The doctor said that they want to know if I had cancer or not and that if I do have it then I could have treatment for it……….

If you haven't had vaginal sex then it's considered unnecessary (at least here in the UK). Could that apply to you?

no......

This isn't correct. It is advised for any kind of sexual contact. I looked into this when I became old enough for screening on account of only having had sex with women.

Darkwings, I assume you're talking about a pap test? It's definitely a really good idea to get it, as they are important for detecting a really nasty illness in time to treat it so if you do want some support in trying to prepare for one then we can definitely talk about that. However, if you are convinced that you do not want it, I think it's worth speaking to someone about your rights. Is there someone you trust at your group home who you could ask about this? I'm afraid I don't know a lot about the system in the US, but at the very least I think that if it is decided that you aren't able to make this decision for yourself, someone should explain this clearly to you so that you understand what is happening. Has anyone ever talked about 'capacity' to you? This is when someone decides if you are able to make decisions about medical care for yourself.

yeah i think so........

no.... i dont trust anyone in the group home......

That's a shame that there isn't someone you can trust at the home. What about elsewhere, how about your therapist? I know she's probably not exactly the right person to ask, but she might at least be able to find out for you or point you towards someone who could help.

I’ll try to email her but I’m pretty sure that she will only talk about the consequences of not doing it………and that isn’t a really helpful thing………

this mouring the staff (MB)was talking to another person who lives with me (MJ) and then the staff started talking to me about the pap test and started to compare her to me saying "how she was mentally challenged and she did good with her surgery so why cant you?" that made me feel like ****!!!!! but even before this the staff (MB) was trying to make me feel worser then i already do saying how if i dont do that test im going to die and no one would miss me!!!!! :crying:


EDIT: i emailed my therapist saying that i needed to talk to her

Well done for emailing your therapist, I hope she will be helpful.

MB sounds like they were maybe trying to scare you into getting the test? Like, if they wouldn't miss you if you died, why would they be so desperate to get you to have it! It's a really horrible way to speak to you though and I'm sorry that that happened.

Do you know if this is just a routine pap test like everyone gets, or is there a specific reason why they're so worried?

thank you...... she hasnt emailed me back yet i sent her two emails already......

oh.....

its the first time that i would have it besides the other one where i freaked out....