What is life?! *SH*Drugs*
 

After over a decade Im considering SH again. I'm already planning it in my head. This week my GP suggested I may have cycle-something or other depression. Bipolar or something similar which would make the past 20 years make more sense. I've developed a new unhealthy fixation and although this time around I'm far more aware of it, still have no control over it. Oh and I started using crack, 'just' a binge once a week/fortnight that I;m slowly accepting I'm losing control over too.

So yeah, I'm here after a 10 year absence. Hello again! And how strange it is to feel I belong in the 'veterans' section lol!

Hi and welcome.

Hello and welcome. I'm sorry you're urges after such a long time are back. I've used lots of illicit substances over the years and sometimes I've done them to just feel 'better' and escape my head.

I'm not going to insult your intelligence and lecture over taking drugs when you're low or, in fact, tell you how dangerously addictive and dangerous crack is.

What I will say is I'd go and talk to someone immediately about this. A few months down the line and you could be in a new hell and one far more difficult to escape

I don't really have advice and am not sure what to say. But I too struggle with the urge to escape my own mind. I just want you to know that you're not alone and I agree, you should talk to someone asap. I hope you found some light.