Just A Question...
 

Have you ever reached that point where you just want someone, anyone to notice how much pain you are in? Yet, you act like everything is completely normal and don't tell anyone whats wrong you still want them to know something isn't right?

It has gotten to the point where I will do subtle (and sometimes harmful) things hoping that they will notice that little something that is off. I don't know what to do anymore...

Yes, I used to be like that. Thing is it isn't always easy for those around us to see how much we are suffering.

Instead of trying to get attention by harming, have you tried starting a conversation with anyone about how much you are struggling?

Or failing that can you reach out to your doctor for support before things get too difficult?

I wouldn't say I am harming for attention... I do thing like that and then wish someone knew how I felt.
I am not good at talking to people about things. Sometimes I will decide I am going to say something to a friend or a doctor and then when I am actually face to face with them I cannot do it

have you thought about writing it down to someone you trust? it doesn't have to be an essay maybe even a few sentences just to get it out i know its hard

The few times I've actually allowed people to know just how much I am suffering, those very people usually run like hell from me, so I'm discovering that confiding in people only winds up in the abandoning me when I need them the most. Truthfully, I only have 1 person that has stood by me through my rough times, and a true friend will (should) understand, and be there to support you if they care. I would tell the doctor anything and everything really. I guess my point here was there is nothing wrong with wanting people to understand when you are hurting; this does not make you a bad person.

I'm with you...when people find out they run like hell so its always the chance that if I tell them then they'll run but if I don't I feel like I'm lying. Its a 50/50 I want them to know and that I dont

I don't know that I would necessarily lie though, I refuse to at this point. As I say, I have 1 friend that tells me to say if I feel shitty; she can tell when I'm lying anyway - We Just have to find those people, I guess. Friendship should be a 2-way street (give and take). I have ALWAYS been the one to listen to other peoples problems, and never able to vent to them.

You said you weren't self haring for attention; any luck with your doctor/therapist?

They don't really know... no one does
I don't go to a therapist regularly eitehr

listen, u have to love u the most, and really become your own best friend.

i really hope u get out of this mentality.

i know what its like.