Advice please help x
 

Every day since it happened I've been so strong, but yesterday I broke, and I'm not sure how to put myself back together this time.
I am not me anymore and I don't think I'll ever be me again.
All my trust is gone, my thoughts are all about what happened and I can't help but question constantly, why did he do that to me?
I feel all alone and that nobody listens to how I feel or could understand, I had only got myself back on track and this is the worst thing that has ever happened to me. I can't enjoy anything I can't even get out of bed in the mornings.
I'm trying to be me and people around me think I'm pushing them away but I'm not I just can't control how I feel anymore.
I don't want to feel anymore, why do bad things always happen to me?
How can I control my thoughts? Everything that happened repeats in my head a that and its tearing me to pieces so much that I've had thoughts of hurting myself again and I feellike there's no point trying anymore... Please help xxx

I know how sexual abuse / assault can become all consuming and affect everything that you do. Please know that this will get better. It will never heal completely but things do get better. I know that you say you feel all alone but you have people here any reaching out for our help is such a great step. Have you had any professional help coming to terms with what happened to you?

There must be a load of thoughts and questions buzzing round your head and sometimes you just need to write them out and get them out from your head. Some questions like why me? and why did he do it? will probably never be answered but you can learn to move on with life. This isn't the end for you. Stay strong.

Sophie.x

I agree with all said completely! It's a process. It's okay if right now you're feeling or doing things that don't make sense to you. Your mind is trying to process this, and it takes time.
You sound like it wasn't a long time ago, when did it happen?
I know it feels like you should be over it right away and you just want to move on and forget, but be patient. It's a process and it takes time. Huugs

Thank you both <3
I guess i just need to be patient with myself, and its hard because i just want everything to be over and to be able to be me.
I do have so many thing that are running through my head and i cant make sense of any of it.
I am so thankful for your support.
Yeah it wasn't long ago, it happened at the end of October.
I will contact this counselling centre and see if i can get the help i need.
Thanks for saying this isn't the end for me, cause i have been feeling like it is since..
Hugs back xxxxxx