Forgotten how to be there for someone with depression? Help please!!
 

Hi!

I'm new to this site.

My ex has been suffering from depression for a VERY long time. Years. I used to be there for him, but always struggled. A lot really.

I wondered really if you had any advice for me?

We're trying to get back on track, and I've forgotten completely how to be with him. When he comes to me to talk about him urges.
I really don't know what to do anymore :(

please help

Has he got any professional support for his depression?

To be honest I think the best way to be supportive is different for different people- could you ask him what he would find most helpful when he comes to you with urges?

In general, things that might help could be arranging fun stuff for you guys to together and being available to listen, if you feel able to. Does he have a happy box or anything? If not, maybe you two could make one together so he has something to look over when he is feeling low to remind him of good memories and to distract from urges.

Also, you need to take care of you! It can be really challenging supporting someone with depression, especially when it is a long term problem. Would you consider joining some kind of support group for people who support loved ones with mental health difficulties?

Sometimes the kindest thing you can do for someone who's depressed is be a shoulder to cry on. Quite often it's not about what the person says, it's just the comfort of them being there physically. Also, continue to remind them that you care, depression can often make you forget that anyone cares.