Cheating... definition?
 

Hi,

I haven't posted for a while but basically just wondered what people opinions were with regards to what they consider as cheating on someone?

Thanks

Hey,
I would consider cheating to be if my partner starts to snog another women or has intimate moment with another person or starts to have romantic intimate feelings for another person other than me.

the peepee goes in the bunghole

I would consider it cheating if there was a kiss or more. Feelings is different, it's whether they choose to act on those feelings. I could forgive a kiss, it depends how much you want yur relatinship to contine, when matt admitted to seeing another woman and sleeping with her, I was desperate to keep him ok said it didn't matter, but he'd made his choice so I don't know what would have happened if we had carried on.

physically.. anything from a kiss upwards.

I would also class it as cheating if ny partner was speaking to (via internet/phone or in real life) to another woman in a romantic kind of way.


Flirting im completely fine with though. My boyfriend manhes a bar an its kind of part of the job.

Thanks for the replies............. it's the feelings bit that I wondered about, I think I may have gotten myself into a bit of an awkward situation :ermm:

This

You need to decide what you want and avoid the awkward situation or tell your partner what's going on as it isn't fair to let them carry on normally if yyou're thinking of ending it.

Hey, thanks for the reply. I know I need to sort my head out big time............ it's just difficult for me at the moment to actually do anything as I am away at Uni, and my bf is really difficult to talk to at the best of times let alone attempting it via Skype. The thing is I'm not sure the other person who I think I may have feelings for feels the same, we've just suddendly started talking/messaging a lot over the past couple of weeks and seem to have gotten close quickly, it's not like anything physical will happen cos he's from back home too.

Maybe have a couple of weeks distance fromboth.

I think a good rule is to think about if it were reversed how would you feel about his actions

In terms of your specific situation, which as I understand it is you have a boyfriend but you have another person you talk to online that you are starting to get attached to?

To me, it does not constitute cheating at all. However that's not to say it wouldn't crush your boyfriend if he read these chat logs. I don't know, it depends on what exactly you say to each other. Having been on the receiving end of this (though arguably worse because it wasn't "another person" it was "other people" and both were his exs), it is something that can be fixed because it is a smaller scale betrayal than anything I would regard as cheating. However it can put a crack in your boyfriend's trust that would take a long time to go away if it ever did.

On a more general scale of what *does* constitute cheating, anything physical from a friendly kiss upwards (by friendly kiss I mean some of my friends and I greet each other with a kiss on the cheek which is obviously different). Also from an online perspective, I would consider web cam activities that some get into as cheating, but not simply flirting though that's still a betrayal.

I'm a strong believer that cheating or not cheating, if you feel that you are beginning to question possibilities with another person, then the kindest thing to do is to let your partner go. To expect them to stick around whilst you make up your mind is pure selfish.

I apologise if this comes over as harsh, but it is a huge moral issue for me.

I really agree with this. If you're seriously 'wondering' about someone else, then that's quite a big clue about how you feel about your current relationship. If you're not happy or see yourself being happy elsewhere, it might be time to really think about your current situation.