So very, very lonely
 

Hi kids, 'tis me. Sigh. I've been having a rough time lately and it's pretty much only gotten worse. I feel like I've screwed up my whole education/life/everything... :'( To top it off, my mom has a new job 4 hours away so I've been taking care of our house and my little brother (he's not little, he's 17 and a varsity football player) anyway, so this past weekend was thanksgiving...my mom came down for the whole weekend, to spend time at home with us and to help me with work (I'm a kennel tech, I have to take care of boarding animals and we had 18 dogs and I was working alone-so my mom had volunteered to help). Dayton (where she lives) was in the football playoffs and my little brother had already kinda thought about moving there to finish out his senior year (and my mom wants him to move there to save some money and keep him focused so senioritis won't be to bad) so they left on Friday to go see the playoff game, and they stayed up there all weekend so he could meet people, and make a college trip to a school he's looking at attending in Houston (35 minutes away from my mom's new house). He's probably visiting the high school right now...if he likes it, he'll be back tonight to start packing, he'll go to his high school tomorrow to un-enroll and say goodbye and then Wednesday he'll move his stuff up to Dayton. I want him to be happy, to be smart, to do what he needs to do...but honestly, the past few nights and days alone has killed me...I'm all on my own, with the exception of 7 dogs (don't ask it's a long story) and my cat.

I don't know how I'll fare without someone to talk to, to laugh at, to fight with....sigh...it doesn't help that I've really been questioning my life, where I want to be in 10 years, what I want to accomplish...I feel like I've wasted so much of my life...and with nothing to show for it.

I'm done moaning...any support or advice would be greatly appreciated, it's been a rough time. :indifferent:

I know how isolating and dreadful the thought of being alone can be, it is not very nice and can completely blind you to whats really there. Is there any way that you could move to where your mum is? or is that not what you want?

Your brother might not even decide he wants to go yet, maybe you should keep that in mind, he may decide he wants to stay. if he does move though and you want to stay where you are could you consider getting a house mate? or making sure you have an activity that involves you meeting people so that you dont feel so alone?

DO you have friends around that you could arrange to do things with? Ive lived on my own for a year, and it was just by chance that my friend ended up moving in with me, but i quite enjoyed that year living alone, it was nice for it to be MY place and to do what i wanted in it, and its nice to escape from any stress in your own house. There are some positives to living on your own, you just need to bare in mind that sometimes you need to make a little extra effort to make sure youre not completely isolated.

SOrry if this was no help.
Beth
xx

It was of help. I can't move with my mom, I'm in college, and I commute to school and have a couple of part time jobs, and there is no college I could could transfer to. He decided he's gonna wait another week or so maybe. And I know, being alone isn't the end of the world, I just have to find a rythm. :) Thanks!