Is this addiction? (Confused)
 

I'm aware that I have an addictive personality. I've been "addicted" to behaviors (anorexia, cutting, etc), and, being OCD, I have obsessive thoughts. But I never seriously used any substance until recently, when I started drinking.
I don't actually drink much (I'm pretty small, and at the moment, one drink is all I need/can stomach), and I don't drink to get drunk. I drink because it makes all of the voices in my head quiet. I can be numb. I can not worry or think at all. For a few hours, I can not care about anything.
However, while I'm not physically drinking a whole lot, I've been craving it. Sometimes it's all I can think about. Drinking also takes away the urge to SI, so I've been weirdly justifying it that way. Conversely, SI'ing takes away the urge to drink. What I've figured is that I'm really craving the psychological release, not the alcohol itself.
Anyway, I'm not sure – is this addiction? I don't really need the specific substance itself, after all, as anything that "helps," like SI, suffices. Also – what should I do about it? I want to stop drinking altogether (I'm underage, so it's also illegal), and I'm trying to stop... But this means that I'll be SI'ing a lot more, too, to cope.
I mean, I know compared to most people, I don't have a problem at all. One drink is nothing to worry about. I feel sort of pretentious, posting on here when I might not even have a problem. I feel like I might be making a mountain out of a molehill, so to speak. I do that a lot.
I dunno.
What are your thoughts?
- Jayne

I don't know if it's addiction, but it's not a healthy way of releasing stress. Have you seen your Dr or a counsellor?

Do you feel like it's maybe a problem?

If so, it probably is.

Do you feel able to not drink? CAre you able to go without a drink without knowing when your next one will be?

If so, you'll probably be fine. If not, you might want to try to nip it in the bud very quickly.

It’s not the level of alcohol intake that’s the issue. It’s the reasons behind picking up that drink that are the issue. Take two people – one has five drinks, the other only has one. The person who has five is motivated by nothing more then sociability and the desire to relax and have fun. The person who only has the one drink does so because they want to shut of a voice in there head that is destructive and could lead to other issues. Which of these two people is drinking destructively?

No matter how much you drink, if you only drink to escape your problems, and then crave it when you do not have it, you have a problem. You are not making a mountain out of a molehill, and you are doing the right thing in addressing what you fell is becoming a problem. It sounds like you have already identified that you are using different types of self-harm to fill a hole, or for the psychological release as you put it, and that the alcohol and other forms of abuse are the symptoms and not the cause (especially as they cancel each other out).

Carrying on the path you are on will not fight the root cause of your issues and may well escalate into a full-blown addiction. Trust me (I’m an old hand at this!), picking up that bottle (or whatever else) to escape your problems becomes easier and easier until it’s the only way you know. Fight the root cause of your problems. Everything else is smoke and mirrors.