Scared.. (Contains S.I talk)
 

I just realized, two days ago...I don't know how to handle pressure anymore. At all. I had a test that isn't scored at all, it really holds no meaning whatsoever... but I was standing in the bathroom, and I just dropped my two weeks clean, and cut. Just because I was a bit stressed. I don't know why. It wasn't that bad...but it's like any negative emotion, I literally have to cut away. I...I don't know how to stop...

I just had the ACT and PSAE this week.
Stressed me out bad, I reacted the same way.
You're not alone at all.
Sometimes it doesn't have to be a bad feeling, it can be a total addiction.
I'm sorry you had to go through that, though.
But be proud of the two weeks, and get back to that.
If you need anyone to talk to, I'm always here. (:

Yeah I had to take some stupid test, that didn't matter at all, so that's why I'm scared, because it shouldn't have stressed me at all, but it did... Thank you though.

How are you doing now? Just because you've slipped up, doesn't mean you've lost everything. Slipping up is a natural part of recovery.

The recovery isn't really effective then, because this is the ninth "slip-up"...anyone I tell that to just says that it's my fault, and that I must not want to stop. But if I didn't want to stop, why wouldn't I have been cutting this whole time? I'm really triggered...

Don't worry about the slip-up's... The more worry you have about anything will make your feelings more dramatic. You can't change what you've done, only what you will do from here.
It can just become a bit addictive even when its not that effective any more and once someone has done it enough times there isn't really a fear attached to it. Ignore people who say things like that, just stop talking to them about it...
I view it as any other addiction, people smoke and drink even though they know its damaging but they do it to feel good, cope with stress or numb themselves. S.I isn't any different at all and I hate it when people say it is.
Don't worry about what people say and feel about it, you don't do it for them so you won't stop for them.
Just do your best and try think positively its all you can do, there is no quick fix. Be patient, your mind will steady itself.