Losing my Grip
 

Hello I am new here and honestly i was afraid to join. I have a problem that I am having a very hard time dealing with, I am 22 yrs old and I am highly depressed and i dont know what to do anymore. The biggest issue is the home life. I still live at home with both my parents and my father i absolutely cannot stand. He is an alcoholic and is very verbal abusive to me and my mother. I dont know what to do anymore. He is the only one that makes me cry and makes me seriously consider ending it all. I have been recommended to go to a counselor for my anxiety problem but I am honestly afraid to go and admit that I need help. I dont want to be locked up and i dont have the money to pay for someone to talk to . I am currently on Prozac to help but I have stopped taking it bc have no ambition anymore. I constantly sleep due to my depression seems to be the only time i get rest. I know I should move out but I currently dont have the money. I am right now on a leave of absence til may. i also dont want to move because of my mother she is the only thing that matters to me now a days, and im afraid if i leave her my father will harm her because he used to in the past when he was drinking. I am not able to talk to my mom about any of this because she is depressed like i am and i dont want to worry her. I have never had a boyfriend because my dad is an asshole and practically locks me up, if i talking to someone on the phone he always ask who am i talking to. there is no privacy at my home. I do not have my license bcecause of a very bad accident my mom was in when i was younger, I had almost lost her so i am terrified of driving. When I was talking to guys I would sneak them in my house when no one was home the first guy i did that to ended up being a sexual predator and is now currently in prison because he was doing really bad things that i never knew about. I need help I dont want to do anything stupid but i am also tired of being miserable. can someone please help me?