piercings & panic attacks.
 

So yeasterday i was on here reading posts waiting for my boyfriend to come out & pick me up. so i call him & i get no answer... we'd had an arguement sort of the night before & he'd sent me some bitchy texts earlier in the day... anyway, when he didnt answer the 3rd time i started freaking out...

literally, i sobbed like a child, had a panic attack & started hyperventilating. which made me get real annoyed with myself.

i hate that, i do. it doesnt happen to me that often. but i couldnt pull myself together, eventually i caught my breath & wiped the streaked mascara off my face and forced myself to leave the house.

then i got my lip pierced & i felt better about life.

that was kinda pointless.
sorry.

no one in real life knows i have panic attacks like that.
i can usually keep it together if i can be distracted but i was just here by myself. idont know.

i think that i tried not to give anyone anything to read into too much, but i was like "i was in a bad mood, i had to have it dont right then." then i was like crap, that sounds incriminating.

and i dont think i did it to hurt myself, i think i did it because it was something i wanted that would make me happy. like if i bought a new pair of hightops.

i dont know.
i love you, bitch.
-Vanity

Often piercings give the same release as cutting does for some people.You get the adrenalin rush and also piercings look great in my opinion.

do you think you could speak to him about this?

it does look great i'm lovin mine.

about having a panic attack?
no... i dont know. it wasnt really that justified. he didnt really behave badly i was just frustrated.. i wouldnt want him to feel like he had to tiptoe around me. usually he wouldnt. i dont even know why that happens to me. its completely at random.

it wasnt even his fault he didnt answer. there was a repairman working on his house phone & his cell had no service.

Have you though about getting proffesional help for the panic attacks?

glad you like your piercing... one will turn into many.they do get addictive :p

i've just started back at work so when my insurance kicks in i might bring that up with my doc. maybe, but like i said, sometimes its just out of no where... and i dont have that much anxiety... like day to day.

i know, i used to have a monroe piercing but it started wrecking my gums. :nono: so i took it out. i kinda want my septum done. i was never a big fan of eyebrow rings either but now i'm considering it. actually i got my lip pierced on the side & i used to hate those too, i always wanted one in the center & i just changed my mind one day n decided i wanted this one.

what do you have done?

i just looked at your pic, you have a bunch!
i'm a lil jealous!